Gimme a punchline

Discussion in 'Linguistics' started by Spud Emperor, Mar 11, 2010.

  1. Spud Emperor solanaceous common tater Registered Senior Member

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    Now, to clean things up a bit, a rambling punfest.

    I'll start, feel free to join in.

    A little calf was shivering in the field when it asked its mother "why am I so cold mother?"..."'cos your Fresian, that's the reason.
     
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  3. Spud Emperor solanaceous common tater Registered Senior Member

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    Not sure but I reckon if I got into character I cadaver pretty good go at it.

    Oh Frickin' Boom tish!
     
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  5. Spud Emperor solanaceous common tater Registered Senior Member

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    So the mother said "let's run around the paddock to warm up" but got a bit carried away and strained her calf.
     
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  7. scifes In withdrawal. Valued Senior Member

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    what is grey, small, has four legs, big ears and a trunk?

    (btw i'm not exactly seeing the difference between a punchline and a joke, i mean a punchline is the funny part of a joke, no?)
     
  8. Captain Kremmen All aboard, me Hearties! Valued Senior Member

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    A mouse going on holiday. Next!
     
  9. Fraggle Rocker Staff Member

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    I guess there are no mathematicians here. The answer is: grape x elephant x cos θ. Hey, that was as funny as the average elephant joke. We didn't have Steve Martin yet, he was still a kid like us.
    The punchline is the key that makes the whole joke funny so you laugh, but it's not necessarily the funniest part. Think of it as the solution to a puzzle. Solving the puzzle is usually more fun than discovering the solution. The punchline or the solution is just fulfillment, satisfaction. Without it you would be frustrated.
     
  10. Captain Kremmen All aboard, me Hearties! Valued Senior Member

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    Great joke Fraggle.
    especially that line about Cos Theta. I laughed my socks off. I was thinking Cot Delta, but that wouldn't have been nearly as funny.

    Perhaps you'd like to try this one:

    how can you prove that 1+cos theta/1-cos theta+1+sin theta/1-sin theta is equal to 2(cos theta-csc theta)/cot theta-cos theta-csc theta +1?
     
    Last edited: Mar 15, 2010
  11. Captain Kremmen All aboard, me Hearties! Valued Senior Member

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    Times up.
    Answer. I don't know, but make sure you ask a mathematician and not a Necrophiliac.
     
  12. scifes In withdrawal. Valued Senior Member

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    Bah!!
    lol, i swear that's the first one i understood in this whole thread since the necro guy jumped in[which i haven't googled yet

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    OH OH i got a F***ING GREAT ONE!!:

    how do you get an elephant in a fridge in only three steps?

    man this'll be fun

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  13. Spud Emperor solanaceous common tater Registered Senior Member

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    The delirium Kremmens.
     
  14. Captain Kremmen All aboard, me Hearties! Valued Senior Member

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    1. Take Elephant to Fridge.
    2. Place Elephant in Fridge.
    3. Close Fridge door.

    Next!
     
  15. Captain Kremmen All aboard, me Hearties! Valued Senior Member

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    :bravo:

    I haven't got an answer to this one. See what you can do.

    How many Necrophiliacs does it take to change a light bulb?
     
  16. scifes In withdrawal. Valued Senior Member

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    maaan you're no fun!! you must be cheating somehow..even though 1 should be to open the fridge door, but you're close enough, actually closer than preferable..:m:

    so, how do you put a giraffe in a fridge with 4 steps then?:bugeye:
     
  17. Fraggle Rocker Staff Member

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    I know this one! I know this one! I finally got one! First you have to take the elephant out of the refrigerator so you have room for the giraffe!
     
  18. scifes In withdrawal. Valued Senior Member

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    :facepalm:

    you guys are just unfair, or am i so novice?

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    here's a better one, (i hope!), an idiot is moving out to the north pole, he ships his stuff in a plane and takes off, at eleven thousand feet the right engine goes off, the pilot says they need to throw some stuff off so the plane doesn't crash, what should the guy throw?
     
  19. Spud Emperor solanaceous common tater Registered Senior Member

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    Good question.
    Firstly, a necrophiliac will only change a light bulb if he can't find any body to fuck..ing help.

    Answer six, one to change the bulb, one to fuck the dead bulb (while it's still warm), one to fuck the bulb when it's well dead, one to fuck the socket, one to remove the charred necro from the socket and one to fuck the blackened corpse!....next!
     
  20. Spud Emperor solanaceous common tater Registered Senior Member

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    Scifes, glad you're enjoying the thread.
    I know you've missed a couple so I'll try to give you a quick insight. Kremmen is an idiot, well he's not, he's a confirmed genius, but he's a bit of a dick, he's English it's his birthright, me I'm from somewhere far less sophisticated and am also bent by nature of geography.
    Every answer so far has some comedic merit, even if only in the mind of the author.

    Anyway to 'get' the answers try to look from a left field perspective. For example, a mountain guide,..think mountin' guide, you know mounting - to fornicate. Therefore Daddy's incestuous question of his daughter.
    Wouldn't that be incest?....break it down, In Cest? Hence,..no dear in the Alps.
     
  21. Spud Emperor solanaceous common tater Registered Senior Member

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    Late for Church.
     
  22. noodler Banned Banned

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    1) The Fox Channel motto: "With friends like us, who needs enemas?"

    And 2)
    The number of necrophiliacs needed to change a lightbulb would depend on which necrophiliac found out it was dead, surely?
    Ah, of course, the first necrophiliac would need to figure out how to unscrew a dead bulb.
     
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2010
  23. Captain Kremmen All aboard, me Hearties! Valued Senior Member

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    I like that one.
    How about this one.
    He doesn't change the light bulb. He lights some candles.
    It's more romantic.
     

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