Do smart women have to play dumb for men?

Discussion in 'Science & Society' started by Magical Realist, Oct 27, 2013.

  1. Saturnine Pariah Hell is other people Valued Senior Member

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  3. ElectricFetus Sanity going, going, gone Valued Senior Member

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    That an interesting theory but I don't think it follows for men with low libido, such men have had few female sexual partners and are not likely intimidated by them either as they don't really lust after women.
     
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  5. origin Heading towards oblivion Valued Senior Member

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    Not only mandrils but even humans:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gu%C3%A9rewol
     
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  7. billvon Valued Senior Member

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    Agreed. But in that case, women are not unattainable objects of desire to such men. They're just people to them.
     
  8. ElectricFetus Sanity going, going, gone Valued Senior Member

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    Yes that is the point: not all men see women as "unattainable objects of desire" or even "objects of desire" some just see them as people. I can see you theory only working for men that are lustful introverts and nothing else.
     
  9. iceaura Valued Senior Member

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    Uh, no, it's stone age and planetary. Maybe not universal, but the exceptions aren't that easily found.

    Spartan girls were famous for beauty, and for walking around naked in broad daylight, and for independence of sexual choice. The discipline of sublimating mating toward military violence was imposed on the young man of Sparta via considerable effort by older men - and the slave women were of course always available, with a bit of effort, to channel the turbulence, along with the wives of impressed older men who wished their wives to bear fine sons. Also, as women could divorce at will and choose mates based on prospects of strong and virile sons, the ability to impress a woman counted for quite a bit in terms of opportunity.
    Unless, of course, she was among the numerous and thriving class of prostitutes - in which case his reluctance would be so much overcome as to allow him to pay considerable sums of money for the opportunity to perform his ghastly duties as a citizen.

    Either that, or men and women do not really differ much in the fundamentals, by culture.
     
  10. billvon Valued Senior Member

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    Exactly. And these, in general, are the people who don't have much trouble finding partners.

    As with everything there are degrees.
     
  11. Captain Kremmen All aboard, me Hearties! Valued Senior Member

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    Men do it too.
    Here's a man who has gone through life pretending to be idiotic and affable,
    whereas he is in fact sharp witted and crafty.

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!


    Boris Johnson, Lord Mayor of London and possible future Prime Minister
     
  12. exchemist Valued Senior Member

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    And, by all accounts, has an improbable degree of success with the ladies……….
     
  13. Captain Kremmen All aboard, me Hearties! Valued Senior Member

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    He is a rich Etonian millionaire, with lots more money to come.
    When women are wearing their money goggles he appears to them like this.

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    Boris
     
  14. ElectricFetus Sanity going, going, gone Valued Senior Member

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    Not all women seek men for money, good looks, etc:

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  15. exchemist Valued Senior Member

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    I think that's unfair on Boris, actually. Women love men with confidence who make them laugh. Boris is evidently splendid company, even if if he does look as though he's been pulled through a hedge backwards.
     
  16. elusive Registered Member

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    35
    Personally I wouldn't want to be married to a man who looked good over a man I could still talk to decades later. I found this study interesting

    Education And Money Attract A Mate; Chastity Sinks In Importance What Men Want

    this is what a study from University of Iowa Health Sciences (2009, February 14) reported and posted on science daily


    Essential characteristics:

    Mutual attraction and love.
    Dependable character.
    Emotional stability.

    Important characteristics:

    Education and intelligence.
    Good looks.
    Ambition.

    Desirable characteristics:

    Good financial prospect.
    Good cook and housekeeper.

    Unimportant characteristics:

    Similar political background.
    Chastity.

    What Women Want

    Essential characteristics:

    Mutual attraction and love.
    Dependable character.
    Emotional stability.

    Important characteristics:

    Education and intelligence.
    Desire for home and children.
    Ambition.

    Desirable characteristics:

    Good looks.
    Refinement.

    Unimportant characteristics:

    Similar political background.
    Chastity.
     
  17. Peregrine Registered Member

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    90
    Make sure to get data from other forums.

    I would also ask the inverse: "Should mean act more masculine and be smarter for women."

    Otherwise, you have predujices and unnatural answers.
     
  18. cornel Registered Senior Member

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    I think this explains a lot:

    Female asks something that can be considered an "intelligent" question, male adds some info, and then suddenly someone(or more specifically, an entire gender) must be at fault.

    There is little room for intelligence in (semi-)sexual relations; nobody ever procrastinated, yelled eureka and said to him/herself: "I should find a way to reproduce to keep the species going."
    it's all evolutionary traits(instinct) and social structure surviving through time.
     
  19. Trooper Secular Sanity Valued Senior Member

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    Maybe smart men need to play dumb for women.

    THIS APPEARED ON CRAIG'S LIST---It's an urban legend BUT…
    What am I doing wrong?

    Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy. I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think I'm overreaching at all.

    Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 100 - 150. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 150,000 won't get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

    Here are my questions specifically:

    -Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics - bars, restaurants, gyms
    -What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my feelings
    -Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?
    -Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story there?
    -Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
    -How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY

    Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.
    --------------------
    THE ANSWER

    Dear Pers-:

    I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I see it.

    Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

    So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

    So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

    Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.
    By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

    With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
    Classic "pump and dump."

    I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.
    ____________
    Rob Campbell
    J.P.Morgan
    Diversified Industrials Investment Banking

    The ending to this video is beautiful and very thought provoking.

    [video=youtube_share;VnfbE_4MlGk]http://youtu.be/VnfbE_4MlGk[/video]
     
  20. Write4U Valued Senior Member

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    20,069
    It seems to me to be a left over from some of our primitive ancestors where the male was usually the larger, more powerful. Today this advantage is moot, as physical power is being replaced with technology.

    I completely agree, nature does not care about patriarchy or matriarchy, as long as offspring is healthy and viable. Moreover, as monogamy is the legal standard in most coutries, there are plenty of females available and there is really no need for men to compete for the same females or for the females to compete for the same men.
     
  21. Write4U Valued Senior Member

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    20,069
    Does it matter much if women are unattainable objects of desire. IMO being an "object of desire" is dangerous enough.
     

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