How do you deal with people who don't treat you fairly?

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by wegs, Oct 4, 2019.

  1. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Perhaps, you have suffered an injustice at work, or in a relationship/friendship. Or maybe you've suffered a legal injustice. How do you personally cope with it? How do you practically handle it?
     
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  3. Write4U Valued Senior Member

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    I always liked the saying; "those my equal don't insult me, those below me can't insult me"
     
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  5. kx000 Valued Senior Member

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    The point of hell was to put dis-respect in it and let it make a home there, but its embodiment turned around and used its dis-respect on the creator, when truly that nihil-thing is friends and brother with "a-morality." Which as it turns out is far worse than evil... when LOVE was going to save all things and then unlock ecstacy for Hell himself. That's the origin of all suffering including unfairness.
     
    Last edited: Oct 4, 2019
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  7. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    Revenge is a dish best served cold.
     
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  8. davewhite04 Valued Senior Member

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    All different strains of the same thing. romantic or friendship are the hardest to deal with for me, none of the others mean anything to me.

    I either wipe out a friend who has gone too far, and try forever with a friend who is just slightly unfair.
     
  9. RainbowSingularity Valued Senior Member

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    find something hard and pointy and strike them with it repeatedly until they appear to be suffering more greatly than i am.

    usa profit for prisoners is a legal injustice to the american people and culture
    that aside...

    Drugs are my first choice
    not being caught is my equal 1st choice

    obviously if they are a child or physically weaker than i am then i assault them and use physical pain and intimidation
    that i have found to be the most widely accepted parenting model
    using physical violence to solve an emotional problem is super fun & by far the most popular !
    its totally mature also

    makes me feel like a total winner

    (((((actually... since you ask... i was in the lift the other day[visiting a friend] and a worker from another floor got in, he looks a bit like the teenage dirt bag semi goth with terrible vitamin deficiency...
    i had just met one of their visitors who had got lost and directed them to their office,
    i inquired with him asking him if their visitor had made it successfully to their office.
    upon which he exploded in a 13 year old childs verbal assault by replying "I WORK HERE!"

    he was quite obliviously suffering from some type of psychiatric disorder and living out the machinations of negativity in his mind in a semi delusional state.

    i dont think he is a physical threat to other people(although touch n go on the sado-masachistic side of things when he gets upset and off-med-like[like the average late puberty teen stuff])
    i am fairly sure he suffers from a variant of depression and bi-polar disorder mixed with behavioral psychological development issues

    soo being the good samaritan that i am, i threw aside my issues and then calmly replied "using his companys name and floor number , & that i knew he worked here.... & that , i am asking you if your visitor got to your office ok?"
    at which he threw his hands up toward his face and panicked further saying he didn't know anything and slightly stamping one foot (like an 8yo tantrum) shaking his head and arms

    he clearly did me an unjusitce
    should i have punched him in the face until i heard his facial bones fracturing and blood splattering everywhere ?
    maybe started a rumour about him being some type of sexual pervert ?
    or secretly harbour hate for him and look for an opportunity to vandalize his property or emotionally upset him ?

    i may inquire at some point with his boss if he has started anti psychotic medication recently because quite clearly needs therapy and almost definitely a short coarse of something.
    im guessing mild bi-polar disorder, probably un-diagnosed or miss diagnosed or off his meds and emotionally wrung out
     
    Last edited: Oct 5, 2019
  10. RainbowSingularity Valued Senior Member

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    i worked around an emotional sadist sociopath with borderline personality disorder(split personality disorder) for a while. that was a trip !

    it is not a one size fits all answer
    different circumstances require different solutions
    different levels of emotional and intellectual development require different types of solutions

    you may wish to give a bit of an idea about the nature of the situation and people to define things.
    (while maintaining privacy etc)

    i met a guy the other day
    whom i experienced having panic rage attack to some common work place difficulties.
    im around 80% sure he would beat the absolute shit out of his children if he ever had any and had not gotten therapy for a few years prior.
    is he evil ? no

    who needs to be punished ?

    how do you re-gain your own Ego superiority ?

    does violence & sadism(revenge) solve it ?
    NOTE Revenge IS Sadism
     
    Last edited: Oct 5, 2019
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  11. davewhite04 Valued Senior Member

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    Did you diagnose them by any chance

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  12. RainbowSingularity Valued Senior Member

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    there appeared to be no chance involved
     
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  13. RainbowSingularity Valued Senior Member

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    having a bit of a more in depth thin
    those odds are around 75%
    if he gets a steady partner who he does not develop an abusive relationship with
    then his odds of being the child beater drop to only around 45%
    if he got therapy during or prior then the odds would drop to only around 5%
    if he didnt get therapy, and then the couple broke up
    his odds would go from 45% to around 70%

    i knew a human once
    it was terrible

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  14. Seattle Valued Senior Member

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    It depends on the particular details. If it was a romantic relationship, unless it was minor, I would move on. If it was a long term friendship I'd try to understand before moving on. If it was a work situation I'd just deal with it but look for a better work situation on the side.

    I wouldn't let it bother me any more than necessarily however. I'd have thicker skin for a work situation than with other scenarios.
     
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  15. RainbowSingularity Valued Senior Member

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    https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Vengeful Justice

    is revenge a lustful act ?

    if revenge is anti christian
    why are soo many mainstream american christian leaders using the term ?

    it seems to undermine their own statements and beliefs that words have power

    not that moral dichotomys are anything new

    if i made the statement
    "Globalisation needs to be brought to justice"
    does the average person and political leadership perceive that as a terrorist type comment ?

    what power have they given to the words and what culture are they projecting and creating by using such words and endorsing culture around concepts of moral doctrine ?

    do they equate defense as being equal to revenge and lust ?
    why would they deliberately confuse the 3 of them ?

    how is that projected as a cultural norm in modern USA ...
    do people normalise their concepts of abuse of others by projected moral doctrines ?
     
  16. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    It's work related. I read an article recently about ''reading things wrong,'' because we tend to get used to seeing things through one lens, our own. So, there could be another possibility, and the person wasn't intentional about his slighting, or not treating me fairly...he just simply might have a lot on his mind, etc. Not everything is personal, I've learned.

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  17. kx000 Valued Senior Member

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    I find solace in belief and pacifism after all the shit I've been put through.
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2019
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  18. RainbowSingularity Valued Senior Member

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    work place emotional truck n trailer...
    often people engage in a concept of culture to interact with work place dynamics
    sometimes that process can get a negative behavioral process because 1 or 2 people share a bad experience.
    workplaces have moods & emotions like a real person.
    learning to get a sense of what the mood is allows you to separate the copied behaviours from peoples true nature.
    equally... bullying
    people often over look bullying as being just a part of the culture
    AND(equally) .. can interpret culture as being bullying
    learning to differentiate them is a big learning curve that requires constant learning(for most people).

    you must be able to compartmentalize things in the work place otherwise 1 bad action or person negatively impacts the entire business/group/team

    it is science
    its not rocket science it is human science

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    that is why the best managers are always learning
     
  19. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    How do you define 'fair' though? Does it require treating every person the same, regardless of ability or circumstance?

    (That's a rhetorical question of course. The answer is no, but I'm trying to highlight how one might distinguish fair from unfair.)

    I guess if Bob was encouraged to come in late and leave early, whereas you were given warnings when you're late - that might appear unfair - but you never know what Bob's circumstances are. Generally, you never know what anyone's circumstances are - except your own.

    I guess the most obvious is compensation. If you are getting paid less than someone who holds the same position, has the same responsibilities and the same experience. In such a case, it very pointedly shouldn't matter what Bob's circumstances are, since neither his nor your compensation should be affected by them.
     
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  20. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    It wasn’t anything trivial. I don’t want to get into it all but I’m feeling better...I’m realizing that there can be other sides to stories that we tend to write the endings to. I need to see it from another view, and it’s helping.
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2019
  21. RainbowSingularity Valued Senior Member

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    most people do not wish to and lack the personal internal balance to study the yucky things in life long enough to get a good window into the inside of what drives them and how storys & endings interact on an interpersonal level.

    Most people are driven by their Egos and simply fail to to let their Ego dictate its need to feed its own addiction.

    keeping that in mind, and not looking specifically at the person in your current story.
    think for a moment how bullys seek to continually write the endings of everyone else's storys.

    while its critical to feel good
    never confuse feelings with solutions
    commonly people carry lust for revenge sadism in their subconscious
    that need to inflict pain and suffering on those they feel have wronged them 99% of the time is taken out as physical &/or psychological &/or emotional sadism on others.
    Typically on close friends and sexual partners or random violence against other groups like men going out to drink & have a fight
    or women lying and exposing personal private information about other women to damage them emotionally & psychologically etc...

    People who confuse feelings with solutions tend to have mental breakdowns or become very nasty people &/or both.
    its not like they dont recover, however it is a common cycle behaviour of predator prey that other humans identify with and then abuse people
    victim shaming
    victim victimisation
    victim blaming
    weakest person blaming
    vilifying the person who seems the happiest and least controlling
    very common behaviours
    most people never admit such things yet interact and carry out such actions weekly or daily
     
    Last edited: Oct 7, 2019
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  22. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Don’t confuse emotions with solutions, iow. I tend to do that sometimes...I’ll think, “I’m feeling better,” but that doesn’t mean the situation is any better at all. But, the question then becomes, is this a hill worth dying on?

    I’d say no, in my case. If one keeps encountering hills however, it could be too that we are seeking them.
     
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  23. Xelasnave.1947 Valued Senior Member

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    Confront them and whisper in their ear...do you know you can hire a hit man for only $10,000.
    Alex
     
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