Recently I was watching a program about a family who chose to raise their children in a gender neutral environment and let them sort of touch-and-feel their way into an identity as either male or female. I think taking an experiment like that is damn good research, but it is an experiment, and could go awry. I wonder if the boy would inherently would feel his way to masculinity or the girl to femininity? Anyone know of any scholarly theories or suchness on the topic? Thoughts? Discuss!
I was raised with both ranges of toys, eg both dolls and toy soldiers, and I didn't specifically gravitate to either male type toys or female ones.
Well, my kids all chose toys supporting the traditional gender stereotypes, even as babies too young to know. To the boys everything was a car or gun. My baby girls would get fixated with other babies, pets and clothes (mainly pink)
That's interesting. I hear of some kids who have a very strong preference for gender stereotyped toys, but most don't seem to naturally favour either end of the spectrum. My brother had a rag doll he was mad about and took everywhere.
The wealthy in England and such used to put dresses and effeminacies of various kinds on young boys. Doesn't seem to matter much in the long run, except for the restrictions on girls that curb what they actually want to do - the ones that operate where the conditioning or whatever didn't take.
I think enviroment is most important when it comes to preferences. While my parents bought me girly things like dolls, stuffed animals, dresses, etc. Most of my friends were boys, I liked sports and active games. My parents never pushed me away from what I enjoyed so I grew up about half and half, I enjoyed some stereotypical feminine things and some stereotypical masculine things. My younger brother was the same, my dad really pushed masculine things for him, but he spent most of his time with me and my mother. He loved cars, but he played with them like they were dolls. The same goes for the kids I used to look after. Their preferences related very closely to what they were raised around regardless of gender or race.
Actually, most do (your brother notwithstanding). This is pretty established research. Even children who have been specifically guided into opposite gender roles, for variously awful reasons (e.g., accidental genital mutilation during circumcision), typically grow up feeling out of place and most eventually end up in the role that is consistent with their genetics.
One of my wife's friends tried to prevent her son from playing with toy guns. She'd get all upset if he even picked up one of my son's toy guns. The result? The kid was totally obsessed with guns. Whereas my son would play with his toy gun when he was in the mood, and play with other toys at other times; this other kid turned everything into a gun. He'd turn sticks into guns, dolls into guns, food into guns. Guns, guns, guns. Biology is destiny.
I think the idea comes from concerns about the experiment we call normal parenting (around gender issues)
We weren't allowed to play with toy guns either. My brother wanted to get a toy gun for some skit he had to do at school a few weeks ago and our mother still said no (he's in high school now) Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!. But was it really this boy's sex that made him only want to play "guns" or was it his environment? I grew up with a boy who loved to play Barbie with me and eventually he wanted his own Barbie doll. His mom bought him one and his father went berserk, going as far as punishing him every time he saw his son playing with the doll and he later threw the toy away. But my friend became obsessed with Barbie dolls he'd draw them on everything, wanted Barbie coloring books, traded his other toys for Barbies from the neighborhood kids and collected them behind his father's back. But when his father left, his mother didn't care and he eventually lost interest by 5th grade or so about the same time most of the girls lost interest in their dolls. I think our environment plays a large role in how our genes are expressed.
Does anyone else here notice that there seems to be a continuum ranging from 'definitely masculine' to 'inbetween/don't mind' to 'definitely feminine'. Some kids gravitate strongly to one type of toy or another, but others don't seem to mind and have a range of toys they like.
That's a very good point. If you make something forbidden kids wonder why and become fascinated with it. I agree with your point about environment being a larger influence. Also, our gender brain differences are only a small part of who we are. Even a very 'feminine' girl might like playing with baby dolls but then discover lego or mechano and leave her dolls behind because, although she's got a nurturing instinct, her mind also loves systems and building things. It's all more complex than just male = warrior, female = nurturer.
If you mean environment exerts a larger influence than nature, I would strongly disagree. I think we are all born with certain personality traits. Environment certainly plays a role in determining how these traits are expressed, especially in extreme situations. But just as a homosexual can't just decide to become straight, a child can't change its natural inclinations.