Every Friday afternoon, a mathematician goes down to the bar, sits in the second-to-last seat, turns to the last seat, which is empty, and asks a girl who isn't there if he can buy her a drink. The bartender, who is used to weird university types, always shrugs but keeps quiet. But when Valentine's Day arrives, and the mathematician makes a particularly heart-wrenching plea into empty space, curiosity gets the better of the bartender, and he says, "I apologize for my stupid questions, but surely you know there is NEVER a woman sitting in that last stool. Why do you persist in asking out empty space?" The mathematician replies, "Well, according to quantum physics, empty space is never truly empty. Virtual particles come into existence and vanish all the time. You never know when the proper wave function will collapse and a girl might suddenly appear there." The bartender raises his eyebrows. "Really? Interesting. But couldn't you just ask one of the girls who comes here every Friday if you could buy HER a drink? Never know --she might say yes." The mathematician laughs. "Yeah, right -- how likely is THAT to happen?"
An engineer a physicist and a mathematician were at hotel for a conference when during the night three separate fires broke out, one in each of their rooms. The engineer grabbed the water jug and and kept pouring until the the fire was dead. The physicist calculated how much water would be required, based on the size of the fire and the availability of combustible materials, measured out the necessary amount and doused the fire. The mathematician looked around, saw the water jug and noticed that it was full. Realising there was a solution to the problem he went back to sleep.
Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! http://xkcd.com/765/ (mouse-over text from image) Dear editors of Homeopathy Monthly: I have two small corrections for your July issue. One, it's spelled "echinacea", and two, homeopathic medicines are no better than placebos and your entire magazine is a sham.
David Letterman's Top Ten Reasons Why Network News Producers Do Not Give Science More Air time: Number Ten: They are unable to locate file footage of the Big Bang. Number Nine: They think that high-temperature superconductors are too hot to handle. Number Eight: El Niño is covered by the weather department. Number Seven: They already did the O.J. DNA story. Number Six: They are unable to find information about semiconductors in the music section of the library. Number Five: They are afraid of reporting on dark matter because they think it is contagious. Number Four: They are waiting for cold fusion. Number Three: They think that the greatest scientific achievement is Tang. Number Two: They wouldn't know the superconducting supercollider from a hole in the ground. And the number one reason why network news producers do not give science more air time: Scientists are from Mars . . . Journalists from Venus. http://www.jupiterscientific.org/sciinfo/jokes/miscellaneousjokes.html
Its just when you think you know everything that you realize you know nothing.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
fora.tv/2009/11/08/Science_Laughs_Science_Comedian_Brian_Malow Another must watch for the science nerds^^^
How not to collaborate with a biostatistician http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/6878253/ :roflmao: warning: nerdy joke - requires prior knowledge of statistics and apoptosis
This indeed is very funny Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Some of the pauses are just hilarious. Peace be unto you Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
My favourite pause is after this Biostatistician: 3 patients per group or in total? Scientist: Yes <pause>
I concur – that is hilarious. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! If I was forced to identify with one of the characters, I have to admit that I would be the non-biostatistician. I just know about biochemical pathways, not all this stats stuff! More than once I’ve designed and performed experiments only for a (bio)statistician to inform me that I cannot draw any statistically significant conclusions from it. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
This is a simple explanation of Evolution in about a minute Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JWKUIDyFNuY Peace be unto you Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
More med than science, but still hilarious! Orthapaedics vs anesthesia http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/6752641/orthopaedics-vs-anaesthesia "There is a fracture. I need to fix it..."
This one is also interesting! Well, this pic I liked a lot and thought of sharing with you Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
There were a few facts about liquid, mass, gravity and motion that were not explained to this poor lady (Britney Spears) before she embarked on this challenge. :bugeye: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekIgI55XG58&feature=player_embedded