Jokes and Funny Stories II

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by Billy T, Jan 10, 2014.

  1. Magical Realist Valued Senior Member

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  3. Magical Realist Valued Senior Member

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  5. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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  7. sculptor Valued Senior Member

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    wegs, origin and sideshowbob like this.
  8. Magical Realist Valued Senior Member

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    The Tucker Carlson Testicle Tanner

     
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  9. Michael 345 New year. PRESENT is 72 years oldl Valued Senior Member

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    Fig Leaf Found

    A little boy opened the large old family Bible, and he looked with fascination at the ancient pages as he turned them one by one.

    He was still in Genesis when something fell out of the Bible. He picked it up and looked at it closely. It was a very large old tree leaf that had been pressed between the pages of the Bible long ago."Momma, look what I found!" the boy called out.

    "What do you have there?" his mother asked.

    With astonishment in his voice, the young boy answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"

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  10. origin Heading towards oblivion Valued Senior Member

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    Is it just my computer or does everyone have trouble seeing MR's cartoons. The ones that I can see crack me up but for about 75% of them I get this:

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    Any ideas how to fix it?
     
  11. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    Its not a you problem; its an MR problem. He keeps posting stuff from inside passwalls. Ive pointed it out to him but to no avail.
     
  12. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    A Sunday School teacher had asked the class to draw a picture of their favorite Bible story. One child drew Adam and Eve in an airplane. When the teacher asked what story it represented, the child said, "Adam and Eve flying from the Garden of Eden."

    The teacher asked, "Who's this up at the font of the plane?"

    "That's Pontius, the Pilot."
     
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  13. Michael 345 New year. PRESENT is 72 years oldl Valued Senior Member

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    Thank you. I've had a few same as origin but never followed through who from or looked for any other cause

    With your explanation of

    He keeps posting stuff from inside passwalls ✅

    I can green tick here and let Huey Dewey Louie know

    Thanks

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  14. sculptor Valued Senior Member

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    Raise my hand if you believe in telekinesis
     
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  15. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    My favorite country song - i.e. the only country song I like:
    First verse:
    "I love my wife, and I love fishing too...."

    Second verse:
    On the night before our anniversary, my wife said, "If you even THINK about going fishing tomorrow, don't bother coming home because I won't be here."

    Chorus:
    "And I'm gonna miss her...."​
     
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  16. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Hmm, I can’t see the images either in your posts (top two of this page), MR. Both posts only display as “IMG.”
     
    Last edited: Jun 4, 2022
  17. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    Yes. His competence at image posting is matched only by his competence at UAP analysis.

    :badum-tss!:
     
  18. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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  19. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Where's Seattle?

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  20. Magical Realist Valued Senior Member

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  21. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    On another forum, another poster describes himself as a "Prosteant Christian". I assume he means "Protestant" but it reminded me of this joke:

    In a Catholic School, the nun was asking the children what they want to be when they grow up. Little Jimmy wanted to be a fireman and little Suzie wanted to be a nurse. (It was in the olden days when boys and girls were different.) Finally, the nun asked little Mary what she wanted to be and little Mary replied, "A prostitute."

    The nun almost fainted dead away. When she regained her composure, she demanded, "WHAT did you say you wanted to be?"

    Little Mary repeated calmly, "A prostitute."

    The nun heaved a sigh of relief, "Thank GOD! I thought you said 'Protestant'."​
     
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  22. Magical Realist Valued Senior Member

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  23. Magical Realist Valued Senior Member

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    Pooch drama..

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