1001 Things to do Before You Die...

234. Play games until I have a seizure.

235. Take a nap.

 

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236. Find out why Roman wants to make amends with me.

 

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237. Stop hate.

 

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238. Kill cosmictraveler before he does that (hate is bad, but without it there wouldn't be violence.).

 

239. Spread more love for the world is in need of it more than ever.

 

240. Figure out how the hell Cosmictraveler thinks he has a clue about how much love was needed 1000 years ago, 2000, 5000, as compared to now.

 

241. invent a new way to produce fuel.

 

242. Find a way for humanity to survive its own idiocy.

 

243.Repent on all past sins.
244. eat a pine cone with cheesey sauce on the side.
247.learn to count.

 

Kill an badger by beating it with a club, then get your mate carry it for miles and dump it on the floor at where you choose to camp. Gracefully drop your pants and then defecate on it's head.

 

Also, defecate in the showers, or in your mates bedroom. Lol, it's all for the laughs XD

 

John smith, I know who you are. When you get a decent bike I will smash it up with a metal bar and beat your face in, you little thing you.

 

As our Vice President, Jason Gottschalk, started becoming aware of the usefulness of the horse in the pleasurable side of the world - his business world. He began studying how they worked, what their capabilities were and how they could be used in the day to day business for local companies. After opening Jason’s Horses r’ us, with nothing more than an lone stallion and a single mare, a tool kit and a briefcase holding his ideas in and a large bucket to stand on, Jason worked with local business men who shared the same belief in the power of horses providing both fun and excitement for all the family. They really did feel that they had made an amazing discovery however it tired them out to the maximum.

As his ideas for horse business broadened, in late 2000, we introduced to him a new breed of horse, the female mare. Jason immediately began to create a bi-weekly newspaper about his fine activities with the magical mares. This sale proved to be the beginning of a long relationship leading for many like minded people to contact Him and take part in the action, each of them bringing forth their own buckets and a camera. Jason has had great success with the horse sex industry. From Newspapers with web presses to small offset photo and porn shops to high-speed laser filming like the best porn films, German of course. Horses r us has provided pleasure and action for all the family and has recently released several new films, Jason has plans to create further stores across the country, specialising in Dogs r us, as well as he said Maybe Goats are us. He said, ‘the limits are boundless, there is so much depth in the idea its worrying. It seems I have came across a new form of pleasure, I like it’.

Although the horse r us business has been a solid building block for bestiality worldwide, it has not stopped us from growing and expanding into other markets as we continue to bring reliable horse porn, excellent sales and service to all kinds of people worldwide.

We have staff members with extensive knowledge and experience with horses , females and horses, Jason’s solo work with the horses, Jason and the ladies pleasures with horses, 14inch and all he take it, advanced filming and photography, excellent glossy magazines and a website and much more. We also have staff members that are very tall and have a large willy for the extra pleasure. Sometimes Jason like to take one of them himself, this forms part of our special offer!

After more than 15 years Horses r us, has certainly become a solid company worthy of your trust.

 

Jack Chidgey
Master Metal Restorer
By
James R. Walker
When you walk into Jack Chidgey's shop, in San Diego, CA, you immediately know his services are much in demand. Mention his name to most faget dealers and you will get a favourable mouth-watering response. With a steady stream of old and new customers his involvement ranges the whole spectrum of gay sex. You are likely to find anything from dildos, to his hand, to his mouth and even his arsehole. If your lucky you’ll get his cock. And believe me that’s a package worth taking.

About a third of his shop area is hidden for extra special fag ceremonies. He loves giving you fagets a fine rogering. His whole shop is dedicated to just about any kind of gay pleasure, there are countless posters on the walls and he has won several trophies for his extra curricular activities in fag land.
Here is what he says about himself;
"In 1950, I started an apprenticeship pleasuring all kinds of faget. This was at a sex store in Seattle, Washington. I worked under the direction of Mr. John Clarey who was a fag School graduate. Mr. Clarey was quite demanding in all the sex positions I did for him which I felt was good because it helped give me a good background and helped train my ring and staff into the best usability.. Years ago I decided I wanted to get into a trade that not too many people worked at because I felt that my work would be in demand; to this day I feel that theory was correct, i just love pleasuring homos so much. Its my life long dream.
“In 1954 I started another apprenticeship in the field of gay sex. I felt the two trades go hand in hand -working with metals. After finishing the apprenticeships, I opened my own shop in the fall of 1958 and have been quite busy ever since, the dildos do sell like hot cakes.
“Over the years I trained five or six young people and they are all out on their own now. I made it a policy never to hold back my sex secrets. I have felt it quite important to pass on all my sex techniques and I have passed them on with a vigorous hard schedule that can turn the most amateur of fags into a star.. For fifteen years now my oldest son Don has humped with me and it's my hope that he will take over the business when I retire, he is confident that his ring will last the years after I’m gone.

Jack Chidgey's style of business is low key and friendly. He lets his quality of workmanship speak for him. He always likes to give you a good shake. Sometimes, if your lucky he’ll offer you a drink and maybe some chocolate, but he always regrets to inform you that the chocolate is a diy style service.


The only complaint I've heard about Jack Chidgey's shop is that it takes quite a while for him to orgasm. I can sympathize; most fagets are in the same boat. There are so few fagets around that all are bound to have plenty of orgasms. Your reward for developing an outstanding reputation is to be even more swamped with work. All in all I would say he handles this problem skilfully and cheerfully, his last sex position which was photographed was with his son, and that seemed to go smoothly.

 

survive a plane crash

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Continuing after the interlude o' numberlessness....

248. Become the first athiest Pope, then revoke all of the doctrines of Catholicism, and declare the religion itself defunct, dissolving it, surrendering the Vatican to Italy, and leave the world confused out they motherfuckin' mind.

 

249.stand on the papal throne with a sword aloft and scream "I HAVE THE POWER" (has to be he-man's sword,thinking about it a really odd name for a program.) came quite close to climbing up to the throne when i was in the vatican.....

250.give dan brown a sound beating

251. go on a week long drinking binge with your grandma

252. eat einsteins brain and gain superpowers.

 

253. Do one of those time-space-continuum paradox thingies that destroys it all, like how they describe it in BttF2

 

254. Marry a good hearted woman and have a nice time together.

 

255.Not be sooooo boring!!!