Insert favourite turnip joke here: (sorry, this is in fact an attempt to channel Spike Milligan, god knows we could use a bit of humour)
Why did the turnip roll down the hill? It wanted to be freewheeling and unorthodox. Everybody laughed. Good one, turnip.
What did the Turnip say when asked about bumping into the Constitution while rolling, unorthodoxly and bigly controversial, down the hill? Nothing; turnips tend to suffer from prolonged vegetative states . . . "Only I can do it"; turnips never back down . . . Why did the Turnip color itself orange? It was expressing a long-held, secret desire to become a Carrot. Not just any Carrot, the most carroty Carrot ever, believe me.