Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by Teetotaler, Jun 17, 2006.
You were born on the anniversary of Washington's death. Is that cool or wack?
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I aslo agree to an extent.
Something facinating is that I know some girls that go for total assholes.
I met some guys, and they were total total pukarific assholes, but they had some hot girls that I would not have minded getting with myself.
Is this a trick question?
I happen to think it is cool. Because it means that GW#1 reincarnated into you. That means you can go around telling people you are the president of the united states.
Ok, this is a subject on which I believe I can be of use.
Here are a few pointers, step by step:
First of all, be presentable.
Have reasonable hygiene, shower and shave every day, wear deodorant, maybe even a little (a little!) cologne. Have at least a minimum amount of fashion sense. If you have a silly/alternative haircut, or no haircut at all, get a reasonable one. This doesn't mean turning into a metrosexual, and if you don't have a sense for clothes, just wear the same nondescript things every other guy does ; the idea is not to win over girls with your style, but at least not to turn off any because of it. If the way you present yourself doesn't put you at a handicap against the next guy, then you're halfway there.
Second of all, and this is the most important, have confidence.
I cannot emphasize this enough. What women look for in a man is confidence. Period. Things like good looks, money and power are only vehicles for confidence. And they can smell confidence -- I'm not kidding, either. I'm a firm believer in pheromones, and if you want to get laid you need to exsude confidence. I'm not very good looking, fatter than average, and yet I sleep with beautiful women because I can display that aura of self confidence that draws women to men.
That's pretty easy to say, and harder to do. Having confidence is like having creativity, it's not something you can learn, but that you have to nurture within yourself until it starts to flow out of you naturally.
In my experience, confidence comes from having the skills to accomplish something. Take something you're good at, and use that ability to make you believe in yourself. If you don't have anything you're good at, find something. Develop a skill, master it, and use that to build confidence.
In my experience nothing builds confidence like learning martial arts. First of all, it should beef you up a bit and help with your posture, which wouldn't hurt. Second of all, knowing you can beat up the guy you're talking to does help with feeling good about yourself. But most importantly, martial arts give you a better understanding and control of your body, which -- and this is something that has to be experienced to be understood -- really changes the way you behave and approach life. Apart from spiritual people, the kind of people I know who radiate the most confidence and charisma are people who do lots of martial arts.
If you're not into sweating, I would recommend taking acting classes. They'll teach you to be less self conscious and to better express yourself, which are also great at building confidence, and skills you'll need to interact with women. Actors are also known for their charisma and that's no coincidence either. But really any sports or any skill will do. Painting, whatever.
Then you have to use that skill to convince yourself that you have abilities, that you can do things, and from that you can build self confidence.
So once your looks aren't prohibitive, and you've got a reasonable amount of self confidence, you're ready to find women to sleep with. Which leads me to:
Step three, talk to women.
The only way to get laid, short of a pill and a gag, is to talk to women. Seems stupid, but most guys stay at home, or when they go out stay in packs with their friends, and never just go and talk to them.
How do you get good at talking to women? Like everything else. You can't become a good athlete or a good writer without practicing, and you can't become good at talking to women without talking to women.
You'll get shot down at first. I still vividly remember the condescending smile that the first woman I asked out after high school gave me, and each time I recall the incident I get a prickling in my heart. But the next woman gave me her number, and the next woman agreed to go out with me, and now my last girlfriend worked as a model for the Ford Agency.
So, where to find women? Well, there's over three billion of them on the planet, shouldn't be too hard...
The easiest thing would be to go to a bar or club with friends. Women go to these places expecting to be approached romantically by men, that's the whole reason why these places exist, so you don't have to be self conscious about doing it.
But I'm assuming if you're an accountant whose past times include masturbating, watching anime and playing video games, you're not much into clubbing, so I would suggest that before you move on to that, you sign up for a class. Aerobics, macrame, whatever. It can be your "confidence-building" class, but I don't recommend it. Again, women know that they're bound to find men at these things. This game is played by both sides, so don't worry about asking out the cute girl in your pottery class, she knows you're interested and odds are she'll be wondering why you haven't done it sooner.
Yes, that's two classes you have to pay for, but them's the breaks.
Of course, you could always go for the Intarwebs, but that's at your peril. I don't remember who said that girls on the Internet are cute/single/sane, choose two.
After you have enough experience asking out girls from classes, then you can go try to pick them up at bars, clubs, parties, etc. As you get better at talking to women, as your confidence builds, the odds of your getting laid will only increase until you finally do.
A few last words of advice:
1- Stay in your league. Most guys except that a simple makeover will make them sleep with Jessica Alba-lookalikes, but that only happens in movies (and bad ones). If you start by chatting up the hottest girl in the room, don't be surprised if you get shot down, and don't use that as an excuse to stop trying. I assume you're no Pitt, so don't try to get a Jolie. At least not at first.
2- Whatever you do, do NOT go down the friend route! Women put men in boxes very quickly, and once you're in that box it's nearly impossible to come out. That box is either labelled "potential lover" or "friend." This is also known as the ladder theory. Don't become friendly with a girl thinking later it can lead to more. It won't. You have to make it obvious to her right away that you're interested in her romantically. If she's not, that's fine, move on to another girl. But do not ever ever become a "friend" or the only thing that will come of that is annoyance at best and pain at worst.
Hope this was useful ; tell me how it works out.
My first comment, delivered to me from the Spelling Nazis: "Masturbation".
Now, as for your problem. You may have thought about this already, but perhaps you could go out more once you're done with school. You know, go where people hang out, like clubs, the mall, cafés, etc. While you're there, talk to some women. Make sure you act nonchalantly interested, not desperate. I think your chances of finding a woman will be pretty good if you do that.
The guy will never get laid properly if first he must lay it down in a bloody forum. Duh.
Fuck the spelling Nazis and Meantime.
Say hello to my grammar Nazi, bitch.
Just kidding. Thanks for your input.
My advice: Get a brick. Hit her in the head with it, and fuck her before she wakes. It's just that simple! I call it the brick system!
It's true: the brick system is a miracle. It worked for me!
+1! I used an encyclopedia though... but it was so big and thick! Worked right out of the box! Brittanica, I couldn't have done it without you!
Coffee, you are brilliant! I am no longer a virgin. I got laid at a 7/11 a hour ago.
That kind of brings a different meaning to the words "I went to 7/11 to get a slurpee."
No, she gave me a "frozen dinner".
Prostitutes are easy to find in any large city if all you want is to get laid, but if you are looking for a girlfriend or a long relationship that motive would make every decent girl run away immediately. You have to find common interests and be friends before you can be lovers, else you're just looking for a tramp and a one-night stand.
Coffins are easy to find in any large city if all you want is to get laid
Be confident and the less the girl initially knows about you, the better. Also, always let the girl know immediately what your intentions are when you first meet them to avoid being stuck on the dreaded "just friends" list. It's better to be shot down right away and know where you stand than to waste your time trying to get with a girl that has already made up their mind about you.
Just hang out with sluts.
They usually end up sleeping with their friends.
Also, ex girlfriends that are single or on the rebound, and don't hate you.
Separate names with a comma.