Gossip

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by wegs, Aug 9, 2013.

  1. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    I think it's wrong to gossip about others. It hurts people to pass on information, especially when it's 'hearsay.'

    What do you all think?
     
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  3. Promo Registered Senior Member

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    Without gossip what would the ladies do in the salons?
     
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  5. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    har har

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    some men are gossips, too, yanno.

    how about listening to gossip...not passing it on, just listening? do you find that to be wrong?

    I used to not, but over the years, I've adopted the 'if you have nothing good to say about someone, don't tell me about it,' policy.
    I just don't like it. :/
     
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  7. Promo Registered Senior Member

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    I don't think its wrong to listen. What is your response going to be if someone starts talking about the neighbor? are you going to say "excuse me I can't participate in this conversation it's gossip?"
     
  8. Promo Registered Senior Member

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    Also, I'm extremely blunt and direct anyways so I never feel like its gossip when I am talking about someone I know, because in the end I am going to tell them what was said anyways. Whether it was good or bad.
     
  9. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    I tend to change the topic after many times of listening to things that I felt hurt the reputation of the person being talked about.
    An interesting thing happens after a while...ppl stop gossiping about others to you.

    To me, it's more than that. It shows me that someone can't be trusted to keep in confidence what I tell him/her if he/she is telling me something someone told to them in confidence.

    In the movie Doubt, the main character who was portraying a priest made the reference to cutting open a pillow and letting the feathers blow everywhere. You can never put all those feathers back into the pillow. That's like gossip.
    I'm paraphrasing lol

    Thanks for your input.

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  10. Promo Registered Senior Member

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    I think there is a difference between gossip and just plain "shit talking" When people betray privacy that's different, I don't think that's so much gossip.
     
  11. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Interesting distinction.
    Hmmm, I have to ponder that.

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  12. billvon Valued Senior Member

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    Depends how you define gossip. "Bad stuff 'bout wegs" is probably a bad idea to make a habit of, "stuff I've been thinking about" probably isn't.

    Rule of thumb: if much of what you are saying follows the construction "he's a great guy but . . ." it's probably gossip.
     
  13. andy1033 Truth Seeker Valued Senior Member

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    Lifes can be ruined by it, and the majority whom are nasty are hell to the others are dangerous in there moron gossip about people.

    I have never bothered with gossip, and glad being totally introverted, it serves no purpose to my life.

    Why you people take part in it i do not know.

    Thats what is good about being an introvert, you only talk when you have something real to say.
     
  14. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Yep, pretty much agree.
    I agree: it has the potential to really hurt ppl no matter how "innocent" it may seem.
    All the gossips I've known gossiped because it was their way to become popular and seem "in the know."

    In the end, they lost the trust of those they gossiped about and to, to others.

    You make good points, Andy!
     
  15. Gage Registered Senior Member

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    I had similar conversation awhile back. Nearly everyone gossips and it seems like most gossip is just a way to communicate news about each other to one another while the rest is just shit talking. Guys shit talk about each other all the time, but most of its shit we would say in front of each other. Now ladies, it's completely different. Why your so cruel to each other is beyond me, maybe it makes all of you feel better to harass each other, or maybe you create drama among yourselves as something to do. Who knows
     
  16. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    There are women who gossip, and women who don't. I don't 'get off' on hearing bad things said about friends and coworkers. Some women (and men) do. Why? Not sure. But, I've been hurt by it in the past, so I think when something happens to you, you become cognizant not to replay that behavior to others.

    Thx for chiming in. It's interesting, that people think about it...it's a very common thing, maybe we become immune to it, and the ill effects of it, after a while.

    Tabloids at the grocery store, telling lies usually about celebs. I think to myself, I wouldn't want to read all kinds of made up nonsense about myself, in all those rags. Maybe they become thick skinned to it. But, that's gossip too, when you think about it. People make careers out of it! :shrug:
     
  17. Bebelina kospla.com Valued Senior Member

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    The many categoeries of gossip...slander, hatespeach, flirt, compliments, ego boosting, bullying, networking..
    When you talk to someone other people are often mentioned in the conversation, so "gossip" is pretty much impossible to avoid, but as someone mentioned there is good gossip and bad gossip.
     
  18. Trooper Secular Sanity Valued Senior Member

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    Bebelina has been the subject of gossip.

    Did Bells rob her of the chance to feel understood, acknowledge her mistakes, and reconnect, or was it unhealthy self-disclosure? :shrug:


    Studies Find That Gossip Isn’t Just Loose Talk
     
  19. Read-Only Valued Senior Member

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    I believe there should be a distinction made between "gossip" and "news." News can be good or bad (John just got a promotion; Mary was in a car wreck) and is usually readily verifiable.

    Gossip can also be good or bad - but usually is bad because it's "juicier" - and is usually NOT readily verifiable nor even verifiable at all. In addition, the party being talked about has no chance to defend themselves. It's the same as being considered guilty with no chance of proving one's innocence.

    Additionally, I consider those who participate in lots of gossip are generally living pretty boring lives and are attempting to spice it up. Another big factor is trying to make themselves look better/more important by tearing others down.

    In short, people who gossip truly disgust me and I avoid them.
     
  20. Promo Registered Senior Member

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    Agreed, my friends shit talk each other all the time, but it's nothing we won't/don't say to them. Ladies are just catty...

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  21. Trooper Secular Sanity Valued Senior Member

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    Studies Find That Gossip Isn’t Just Loose Talk
     
  22. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Hey Trooper ...
    I'm not sure of the policy here for posting excerpts of threads that have since been deleted or closed, but maybe you should delete that comment relating to Bebelina, just to be safe?

    Just don't want this thread to be seen as in violation of forum rules.
     
  23. Trooper Secular Sanity Valued Senior Member

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    The thread was closed but it was never deleted. It’s still accessible. Do you think Bells should have deleted it?

    http://www.sciforums.com/showthread.php?135032-The-All-About-BEBELINA-thread

    They don't have to close your thread. You can report it, and they can simply delete my comment, give me warning, or ban me, if they feel it's appropriate to do so.

    Once again, did Bells rob her of the chance to feel understood, acknowledge her mistakes, and reconnect, or was it unhealthy self-disclosure?
     

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