First and foremost, it's rather ironic that I'm posting this. It was about 10 years ago on this same forum that I posted something similar during my last relationship. But, in the end, I took you guys' advice and it all worked out. Thus, here I am again... Well, my boyfriend and I have been together for just over nine months now. I love him a lot, truly. And there's literally no doubt in my mind that he loves me too. So, whatever your response might be, don't let his loyalty and faithfulness to me be a concern...because it's not. About a month or so ago, I brought up the idea of us potentially moving in together in about a year (a year from about now) when I transfer to my next school. I figured it would be perfect timing for both me and our relationship since I will be going to school about 45 minutes away, he's still living with his parents (at 29 years old), and thus it would be good for him to make that break and for me by both having him closer (physically and emotionally) and helping me financially by sharing some of the bills. I figure that because we will have been together for approaching 2 years at that point, it's perfect timing in a relationship to take that next step. So, yeah....seems like a perfect timing all around, right? Well, when I brought it up, he got a complete deer-in-headlights look on his face. After trying to discuss this over the past few months, it became evident that he has some STONG opposition to long term-commitment (in regards to future plans). While he wants to be in a relationship with me in the future, he doesn't see him being ready to move in together 5-8 years at MINIMUM, if ever (his words). Any talk of marriage is not even a possibility. Essentially, he wants for the next many years of his life what we have now--seeing each other a few times a week, doing things together, having sex, etc, but not with any plans or growth. For me, that's a big problem. I don't want to be stuck in the dating phase of our relationship for that long. I'm already ready to make that next step (moving in together) and, after two years, think it would be perfect timing. But he has literally no future goals for our relationship that symbolize us growing together. He wants to be with me, for sure. But just as we are now. And I.........I can't do that. We have talked about this a LOT lately, and I'm torn because I don't want to leave him but I also don't want to be stuck in a stagnant relationship that doesn't feel like it's ever going to evolve into anything more. I don't know what to do. I guess I'm posting this because I'm hoping that someone somewhere will have some great third party advice that may either help me or him better understand the current situation, or at least what either one of us should do about it.