thanks, but there are alot of people who post on here who have great minds, TW4 ? i dont recognise that post code, my postal code is E8 now, im moving to a really nice area soon though, im sick of hackney, im moving to finchley road, near swiss cottage (i work there sometimes and liked it so much that i convinced my wife to move there). peace.
that site has some good info man, i was just reading the whole of the front page on how weapons training improves you and also improves your unnarmed combat skills, i feel the same way as the guy "teaching" on the site, thats some good advice for begginners, i practice with alot of weapons, i actually have too many all over the place, the shaolin monks train everyday with a sword, but in battle they never once used a sword to fight with, in real battle the shaolin will use a regular bo staff always, the sword they train with everyday is to improve their skills overall. it is used to mentally prepare and condition, not to fight with from there point of view, they see the staff as more effective, (the shaolin are so good with a simple staff) im not lying when i say this but an unnarmed monk can take out a few regular guys with his bare hands by himself. but armed with a staff the monk could easily take down a dozen. thats no exageration trust me, i myself can fend off over 4-5 people with a staff, fighting multiple opponents with a spear/staff type weapon is perfect for the weapons unpredicteble form. peace.
As it happens the "reason to call" in my last message strayed toward the same fault, the use of a public forum for personal purposes with another context in mind. Sorry about that. Corresponding privately I'd thought that she'd understood me exactly, only to find out too late that from her side of it that was hardly the case. It is a dangerous thing this exact understanding, the way that two people too attached to their views may exactly understand the same situation in two different ways. "The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place" (George Bernard Shaw) Beware that working too much is too much. For peace of mind less is more. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! -------
I know it well. Used to live near Chalk Farm and the wife still works at the Royal Free Hospital, Hampstead. We had to move away because I was choking to death on the bad air. I am not too impressed by great minds, more by honesty and good purpose. You can look up areas from postcodes here http://www.streetmap.co.uk/ -------- RH.
I tend to agree with regard to weapons. I have custom made (mostly) traditional weaponry for decades. In order to know about a weapon's balance and other important characteristics, etc.. I have to know how to use them. Yup, I learned about a few of my own characteristics along the way! I have a few lying around also! Maybe ebay someday.. *__-
And the quote should continue... "when it hasn't". Sometimes communication is possible. I understood perfectly what she was saying. I'm not saying we understand each other perfectly, just that that particular communication was understood. Nice quote, though.
This has been perplexing me for days, and I've decided to take a bite at it, no matter what. From the perspective of a dualist, a separatist, one who belives in a context-independent self (yes, I have said this phrase only a gazzzilllllion times, recently, I apologize, but seriously now --) Mr. Shaw has my agreement. But Ajahn Amaro brought to my attention the other day -- You can never get close to someone, the separation seems greater and greater as long as *you* try to get close to the *other person*. This is a relationship of separateness. But if relating is not based on the I/you distinction, but on metta, there is closeness. This is a relationship of wholeness. Not to go lofty on fancy terms -- but my experience supports this. Depending on what I focus on in communication, I have the feeling that communication either happened, or not. Have you ever noticed how sometimes, you might feel obliterated by the other person's pain or happiness? This obliteration, this feeling of being disregarded happens to me when I don't have good will, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity. (Ajahn Amaro's talk on metta.)
What a sorry fool I am then to own such a small comprehension. Such is life, the way we strive for perfection only to end up with a longer list than ever of inadequacy, defeat and disappointment. When last did I hope to understand anything said so perfectly? Long long ago. Oh, what a strength it would be, but to understand myself so perfectly. If only to see oneself as others do. Vanity, all is vanity. ---- RH.
I was reading a book by some famous sufi, and he mentioned the fact that the better you get as a musician, the more explicitly you hear any little "inadequacy". I am very sad and burdened by this striving for disappointment today, after a long stretch of weeks when that feeling was not around. It is hard to feel that you know what the truth is about yourself, when many aspects of yourself only matter in relation to others anyway, and if you were on a desert island some would just disappear.
Unfortunately I don't take advice from a celibate on how to be close. Is this the sort of thing you have in mind? RH, 17/03/06, 19:33:20: You worry all the time what hurts you but don't give a shit what hurts anybody else. Spoiled child. Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka, Nejka 17/03/06, 19:35:27: how am i to know what hurts others? What sort of communication does "how am I to know" betoken? Sounds lame to me. In my life I never knew so many who were reluctant to show how they feel to somebody willing enough to listen, and compassionate, sympathetic, joyful and equanimous about it. ----- RH.
It is twice as bad for as long as you fail to take my word for it. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! Nobody at your age knows how bad it gets to be. I am talking reality here, not playing to the gallery. --- RH.
I know myself very well; spent most of my life on the job; scarcely a habit or psychological insecurity not well known to me. Having to cope with the others' prejudicial delusions, that is the problem with seeing as others do. For the most part then I do stay clear. It is not worth the bother. ---- RH. (spelling edited)
You don't know me in person. You haven't even heard me. Written communication is very very frustrating for me, having to put everything into words. Putting things into words -- yes, I deliberately took it upon me to be clearer, to be able to know and speak my thoughts and intentions exactly. It is frustrating for me nevertheless. I may not be good at reading people's emotions, nor my own, yet physical contact makes a world of difference to me, a difference words alone can't bridge, no matter what they say. EDIT: Written communication alone -- it feels as if I am talking to myself. No wonder I get so focused on myself.
I see. 6,017 posts to sciforums and all you ever really did was to talk to yourself, frustrate yourself, and obsess yourself with yourself. I am glad at least that we begin to agree on that. ----- RH.
I'm sorry, please don't be mad. Next to all other possible reasons for me being the way I am, I am also an only child, and this comes with some specifics, some good, some bad. I am most viscerally capable of not caring what other people think. On the other hand, I have a painfully soft spot for what other people think. The extremes are disturbing and confusing me. It could be that your problems with communication are completely different from mine.
But consider -- it brought me the amazing gift of becoming able to hear myself, after being deaf to myself for the most part of my life. I think it was well worth it. Please be glad for that.
I am not mad, on the contrary, quite calm and clear today. If you're glad Nejka, then I am glad, but I'd not been seeing so much of your being glad. My own affliction is rather one of "seen it, done it", the lack of stimulation when what I hear is much the same as that which I had already heard, and when I seem to need to repeat myself. Already I have had more than enough of that here at home, many long years of it, and the prospect of more of the same is not so appealing. I had thought, and still would like to think you are more creative than that. The choice is yours: fight or retreat. ---- RH.
That's because you don't actually see me, silly! Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! I am being extraordinarily exhuberant, but typed words don't do this justice. Here's a challenge for you: Loosen the grip, it smothers. The day comes when staying tight in the bud is more painful than blossoming. But both keeping the bud tight, as well as tearing it open, does no good to the bud. Chicken, when hatching, must carve their way out of the egg shell, or they lack that essential sense of being self-reliant and strong. Butterflies must pull themselves out of the chrysalis, with strife, or their wings are wrinkled and can't fly. Flowers have to be let to blossom naturally, the rough leaves that embrace the blossom not be removed by force, or the petals are wrinkled and other parts malformed or not ripe at the proper time. These things are so for a reason, and humans are not much different. The challenge is to let these things happen as they do, as they take their own course. If you force them, they go wrong. If you refuse to sit and watch -- well, then you'll never know what will happen.
