Sciforums' Largely Annual Probably Bestest Member Thread

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by GeoffP, Aug 17, 2015.

?

Who shall you vote for as SciForums' Bestest Member for the remainder of 2016?

  1. GeoffP

    7 vote(s)
    70.0%
  2. GeoffP

    9 vote(s)
    90.0%
Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,087
    In honour of several returning esteemed alumni of SciForums - oh! and Dwyddyr - I thought it was about time to follow up on the ongoing pursuit of eternal glory and adoration that is bestowed on me the internationally recognized (in that many of our members come from different countries, and that some of them will recognize it) contest known colloquially as SciForums' Bestest Member.

    Why SciForums's Bestest Member, the new among us may ask? Well, firstly, shut up, you newbie clucks. When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you. But, and more importantly, secondly, there are many reasons.

    SciForums is for the place that you are now. Yes, right now. Look above you in the freaking URL. Can you not see it? For Christ's sake, if you're some kind of internet spider, just speak up now so we can properly ban your worthless hide - and, don't forget to vote. Very important. You vote, and I'll buy whatever unusual services you provide as a spambombing Bangladeshi 'Magic love doctor'. No, really. I promise.

    Bestest is the term that we use to describe that person - poster or member - of SF that is the, just, well, the absolute bestest that this not-society can produce. It's that very bestest member of the socially tortured clique that comes here at least once a day to troll and scream at strangers in a way that only a family member suffering from Tourette's Syndrome would consider in any way normal or objective. You know him - or her... well, him in this case. You've passed him on a thread, or sent him upbraiding PMs. Maybe he's the dictator of a small East-Southeast Asian country that absolutely exists, or some kind of a bastard. And, maybe at the time, you might have wanted to fry him in oil, but you didn't, and for reasons not only of distance or general legality, but because you recognized that, at the centre of his dark, miserly heart that he really was something special and, well, just bestest. As in, probably better than you. No, that's not fair: he's definitely better than you are. And it's not from working hard, or possessing qualities, but just from that light of inner bestestness that casts a light on BS, and then sets fire to that BS, and then ridicules the attempts to put that flaming BS out, like the serendipitous midnight dance of an elderly neighbour on a bag of flaming dog poo sitting on his welcome mat.

    Member, of course, is a rude colloquial for penis. One might ask: "how many members are there on SF at any given moment?" And of course, there are many.

    Now, having said all these things, I think that this reflection will cast your cross-eyed gaze inward to search your soul - well, you probably have one - for a name that will stand out, against the lists and lists of welcome and illustrious candidates to be, for the several months of 2016 that remain, as Sciforums' Bestest Member! Please make your selection from our selected pool of candidates above.

    Thankyou for your votes and - sniff - God Bless America. Or Myuu Bless it. Or... God Bless Myuu. Yes, that's the one.
     
    Last edited: Aug 17, 2015
    scifes likes this.
  2. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  3. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,087
    Just as a postscript, I have to say that I couldn't decide from among the candidates, and just voted for all of them. It's just the way I am.
     
    joepistole likes this.
  4. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  5. kx000 Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,942
    It too voted for both Geoff's just to be fair.
     
  6. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  7. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,087
    Myuu bless you too, if you've bought a T-shirt.
     
  8. Dywyddyr Penguinaciously duckalicious. Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    18,951
    I thought long and hard before raising this topic in the other thread for just this reason[1].
    I think that the competition[2] could, reliably and considerably more accurately, be retitled The GeoffP Self-Aggrandisement Opportunity[3].
    On the other hand it appears that this year's choice of candidates is more honest[4] than the last time some fool[5] brought up the subject.
    I have decided to not vote on the grounds that it won't make the slightest difference either way, but I predict that GeoffP will win by a huge margin[6].

    1 But then I thought "I really fancy a coffee and some Bourbon biscuits, so I'll mention it and then get stuck in".
    2 Such as it is...
    3 Especially since that perennial favourite Rottie is no longer in the running.
    4 "Less transparently dishonest" would, perhaps, be a better term.
    5 Er, it was you, wasn't it?
    6 On the (not at all unfounded) assumption that GeoffP will count the votes and check the *cough* honesty of that count I'd say that his margin will about 6,000,000 above the nearest contender.
     
  9. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,087
    Well! While I appreciate the not-quite-contender's honesty and numeracy - I think 6,000,000 votes above the nearest other contender's resultant score will be probably about accurate - I can only express my dismay at a support not nearly so abject as could be hoped for. After all, if I am indeed Self-Aggrandizing, am I not doing so for the ultimate benefit of the posters of SF? For surely nothing could be more important than, indeed, myself and my own... well, as the famous East Korean personality Tom Cruise says in Jerry Maguire: Help me help you help me! And that is advice we could all benefit from. I mean, really, in any contest between me and a rotting dog, I think I know who we'd really all vote for.
     
    Dywyddyr likes this.
  10. Killjoy Propelling The Farce!! Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    5,238
    A write-in vote for Nobody.

    Because Nobody matters.
     
  11. timojin Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    3,252
    Who the hell care , can you post something in your scientific field
     
  12. Randwolf Ignorance killed the cat Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,182
    Careful, Geoff is actually one of dem real scientists! You know, someone who has a "field" - by the way, what's yours?
     
  13. Bells Staff Member

    Messages:
    23,362
    I miss Rottie.

    Although when the winner was Wes and the forum was awash with 1 of Wes (I believe I was 12 of Wes), ah the memories..

    I let my dog decide.

    Sadly, he licked your avatar. Then tried to climb onto the desk with a seedy look in his eyes.

    The rest is best left unsaid.

    Suffice to say doggy whines ensued when I shut the thread down immediately, so I thought it best to not vote. You know, just because. Plus your avatar will never be the same to me again.

    The word traumatised comes to mind.
     
  14. Dywyddyr Penguinaciously duckalicious. Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    18,951
    I think the Wes thing was before my time, or, possibly I was too much the reticent newbie to participate.
    But I did manage to catch WWAD[1].

    How does one traumatise an avatar?

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!



    1 Which, if memory serves, managed in a roundabout way to get me a name check on the SciWiki with "snot'wuh".
     
  15. Dywyddyr Penguinaciously duckalicious. Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    18,951
    You're not supposed to mention GeoffP's field.
    He's rather sensitive about it ever since the court ruling about him and livestock.
     
  16. Bells Staff Member

    Messages:
    23,362
    Be traumatised by...

    Not traumatise an..

    Puppy is now sitting with head resting on desk, guilty and mournful look on his face.

    I do miss Athel.

    Praise the lord almighty WWAD!
     
  17. timojin Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    3,252
    I am a dishwasher, , I don't flash my credential
     
  18. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,087
    A vote for nobody is a vote for sanity.
     
  19. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,087
    Bah! Nothing proven, Sir. A fie on your legal exactitude.
     
  20. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,087
    Ha! Fuck, no.
     
  21. timojin Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    3,252
    You have a foul mind to fingers to keyboard
     
  22. GeoffP Caput gerat lupinum Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    22,087
    Well, I wasn't the one who just wrote that, sir.
     
  23. James R Just this guy, you know? Staff Member

    Messages:
    34,419
    I don't care what any of you say. I'm voting for GeoffP!

    He is certainly the bestest rude colloquial penis on sciforums. Or something.
     
    scifes likes this.

Share This Page