The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

Discussion in 'Linguistics' started by wegs, Apr 27, 2022.

  1. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    This is something quite unique and refreshing in terms of finding words to convey some of the strangest feelings. I believe the content of this book is like discovering a hidden treasure. The descriptions are so deep and poetic, the author put sincere thought into this book.


     
    Last edited: Apr 27, 2022
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  3. Seattle Valued Senior Member

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    It's definitely a "chick" book...amiright...

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  5. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Lol! Not necessarily...

    Certainly everyone has felt “obscurely sorrowful” at one point or another.

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    Open thy mind...
     
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  7. C C Consular Corps - "the backbone of diplomacy" Valued Senior Member

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    Ah, I wondered why "Ambrose Beirce" initially flashed to mind. The image must have reminded me of "The Devil's Dictionary". Two wholly different poles of thought orientation.

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  8. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    That looks worth reading too. Regular words given new meaning it sounds like, with a cynical twist.

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    Egotist - a person of particularly low taste, who is more interested in themselves than me

     
  9. Seattle Valued Senior Member

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    Haha...I just meant that the number of guys who are going to buy a book about being "obscurely sorrowful" is probably not enough to put the book on any best sellers list.

    We all have our down days but most guys (IMO) would deal with that by moving on and not dwelling on it. Many women might buy the book, reflect on it, have a good cry and then (hopefully) move on.

    It's just the difference in the way the two sexes tend to deal with things (and yes, there are two sexes even though there are more than two genders)

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    Here's the classic example. A guy has a tough day at work, comes home and his wife asks about his day at work and he just wants to leave a work problem at work and not have to continue talking about it at home.

    If he stresses out all night about a work problem it does nothing. He needs to be at work to deal with that problem.

    On the other hand when his wife comes home after a tough day at work she wants to talk about it. She tells him about her problem with her boss and what she should have said to her boss and how her boss doesn't understand her.

    The guy tries to "fix" the problem by offering some advice such as "Did you talk to you boss to let him/her know how this situation is affecting you?" Pointing out that talking to the husband rather than to the boss isn't very effective.

    She then lets him know that she doesn't want him to "fix" the problem, she just wants him to listen and to be supportive.

    Anyone who has been married for any period of time eventually figures this out so the husband comes home and the wife gives the husband 30 minutes of decompressing time and the husband gives the wife 30 minutes of just listening time and of being supportive.

    It's just generally an example as to how the sexes process things differently. Guys have problems and women have problems but it's just a fact that most of the "self-help" books are purchased by women, wouldn't you agree?
     
  10. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    I don't consider The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows to be a ''self-help'' book, it's really more of a creative look at different perspectives. I find it more philosophical in a way, than a 'how to' for shifting one's perspective on a given situation. Overall, it's pretty relatable.

    It's interesting though that you see the book as pandering to women's ''sensitivities,'' when it's really designed to help people in a general sense, to find meaning in the most uniquely strange and unusual experiences that we often experience in life. Where there was once no words for those feelings/sensations, now there is. *Not that I'll be using these words necessarily, some are kind of out there, but just that someone took the time to coin new terms for life's ''obscure sorrows'' is kind of inspiring, in and of itself.
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2022
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  11. Seattle Valued Senior Member

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    I didn't really think this book was a self-help book. I just used that as another example of what I was talking about. Regarding this book...I haven't read it so I can't (and wouldn't) try to make any specific points about it other than the title...the title just doesn't sound like something that would have mass male appeal.

    There's nothing wrong with "chick" flicks either, it's just that most males aren't into them. The video that you linked to also doesn't really give any previews or examples so it's hard for me to know much about it other than the title and the music played.

    I'm sure it's an interesting book in reality. I read a book once about the chemical elements. That doesn't sound especially interesting other than as a way to learn more about each element but in fact it was probably more like your book because it really wasn't specifically about the properties of the elements but it was random historical essays about how some of the elements played a role in history, how they were discovered, etc.

    In other words, a good writer/author can find a way to make any subject interesting.
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2022
  12. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    A guy wrote the book, so maybe his mileage in life is just different than yours, and felt this burning desire to coin words and phrases that match those experiences.

    I was going to add another video but thought it was interesting enough that if people are curious, they can look it up for themselves. The words themselves though? I'm not sure they'll become mainstream vocabulary (but who knows), yet the ideas behind the words are mainstream in that we all have felt these odd sensations before, but didn't have the right words to describe them? For example, "anemoia nostalgia' is when you yearn for a time you have never experienced. I'd liken that to looking at old photos of say your grandparents when they were kids, and feeling this odd nostalgia come over you.

    That's true, and what went through my mind when learning about this book is ''that would make a great gift for someone who has everything.'' lol

    I posted this in the linguistics section, but seeing your viewpoints, maybe the ''General Philosophy'' section would have been a better fit.

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    (I'm half kidding.)
     
  13. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    From a female comedian:
    Two guys can sit on the same couch for two hours watching a football game and not say a word to each other; when they go their separate ways they're both thinking, "What a great buddy I have!"

    Two women can sit on the same couch for two minutes and not say a word to each other; when they go their separate ways they're both thinking, "Why does she hate me?"​
     
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  14. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    This is a record for my thread going crazily off topic. It’s usually not on the first page.
     
  15. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Joke thread is that way ——>
     
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  16. Bells Staff Member

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    Mod Note

    So you haven't read the book, know nothing about it and yet you have instead read the title and determined it's a "chick" book, then went on to give us details of how men and women differ in their approach - in the world according to Seattle?

    For your information, it isn't a "chick lit" book. Far from it.

    Heaven help a "chick" who's into heavy metal or horror movies or grunge, super hero genre, etc..

    Your lack of knowledge of women (and men) for that matter is astounding. Take the movie Bridesmaid as a prime example. It's a gross out comedy, but was supposedly a "chick flick". I don't know a single man who was able to get through the wedding dress shop scene without gagging somewhat and being severely grossed out by it.

    The whole term "chick flick" is kind of offensive. Care to give me an example of a "dude flick" that's only aimed at men show me how women won't be into it?

    Either way, this is completely off topic.

    If you haven't read the book and have no interest in learning about the use and invention of words to describe feelings, things, objects, emotions, thoughts, etc, then I really don't see why you're injecting yourself into this thread to label something you haven't even read and then dismissing it because apparently you're a dude.

    Speaking of off-topic:

    Along the same line..

    Two women can sit on the same couch for two minutes, read this thread and not say a word to each other, when they go their separate ways, they're both thinking, "why is he such a dick?"..

    We have a joke thread in Free Thoughts. Keep it there.
     
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  17. Seattle Valued Senior Member

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    So what we've learned is that your viewpoint is more "correct" than anyone else's. I'm not surprised.
    What have you contributed here, exactly? Have you read the book or is your knowledge just limited to the Wiki article?

    A dude flick might be Rambo or something similar. I didn't imply that most movies are either chick flicks or dude flicks. There are a few however that do tend to fall into one or the other of those categories.

    Again, what is your contribution here other than being unfriendly? That seems to be your "thing", no? Being offended...?
     
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  18. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    Let’s just stay on topic...which is about the content of the book and similar concepts within the book. I posted this specifically under “Linguistics,” in hopes it would spark conversation about the creativity of this book. The topic isn’t about men vs. women.

    Anyway, let’s just stay on topic.
     
  19. Bells Staff Member

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    Are you incapable of sticking to the subject matter of the thread? And unfriendly? Since when have I ever been "friendly"?

    You are commenting on something you've never read, dismissed it as "chick" lit, and then tried to change the entire topic of the thread because you need to explain to the other woman participating in this thread what constitute "chick" lit or movies, all while commenting on something you haven't even read or bothered to read about, nor have you bothered to watch any of the videos pertaining to the subject matter. Whether I have read it is beside the point.

    If you can't stick to the topic, if you don't know or understand the topic, don't comment on said topic and try to change the subject because you want to share your opinion as to what constitute "chick" stuff.

    It's off topic.
     
  20. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    It's interesting that this book is essentially a collection of ''made-up'' words by the author to explain feelings that we don't always know how to describe. It got me thinking to common everyday terms that someone at some point, ''made up.''

    So, I wonder why some words stick more than others? Maybe if we start seeing words contained in this ''dictionary'' appear in literature over the next several years, or become more mainstream in journalism, they too will no longer be ''obscure.'' Vocabulary is a curious thing, it's not relegated to strict rules.

    Just some random thoughts swirling around in my mind.
     
  21. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    Maybe if we saw some of them here, they would be less obscure.
     
  22. wegs Matter and Pixie Dust Valued Senior Member

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    One of my favorite words so far in this book is ''sonder.'' I could see a word like that gaining traction. It means when you come to the realization that every ''stranger'' around you is living a life as complex as your own, albeit with different sets of highs and lows. The author's intent is for these words to be used, it's not one of those ''coffee table books'' that is for decoration and little more, in my opinion.
     
  23. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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