This Is That & That Is This

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by StrangerInAStrangeLa, May 13, 2017.

  1. StrangerInAStrangeLa SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    You cannot burp in outer space. Gas requires gravity to separate from liquid in the stomach.
    from Are You Kidding Me? by Harry Bright & Jakob Anser

    Using the highest strength grade of Velcro, a 160 pound person will stick to a wall with only a 4 inch square.
    from Little Known Facts About Well Known Stuff by David Hoffman

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  3. StrangerInAStrangeLa SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    The American Kennel Club Guidelines For Dog Show Judges

    Excuse any dog that in your opinion :
    menaces.
    threatens.
    exhibits any sign that it may not be examined in the usual manner.

    Disqualify any dog that in your opinion attacks any dog in the ring.

    from The Official Rules Of Life by Seth Godin

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  5. StrangerInAStrangeLa SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    A scientist in Atlanta collected more than 10 pounds of bullet shell casings from city streets during lunch hours. They ranged from .22 caliber to bullets used in the AK47. Police officials said that didn't mean the city isn't safe. They said people could be firing weapons elsewhere & leaving the shells in Atlanta.

    Now that is a long shot.


    from Hey Idiot! by Leland Gregory

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  7. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    *Ba-Dum tsk*!
     
  8. StrangerInAStrangeLa SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    Over 4 feet long & weighing over 100 pounds, the South American capybara is the largest rodent in the world. In the 16th century, the Catholic Church classified it as a fish so that it could be eaten during Lent.

    from Are You Kidding Me? by Harry Bright & Jakob Anser

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  9. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    I wonder how much truth there is to this.

    The rule during Lent isn't "you must eat fish"; the rule during Lent is "you should not eat the meat of a warm-blooded animal". All they would have had to do was not classify a Capybara as a warm-blooded animal with meat. That's still leaves the possible allowed classifications wide open.

    I'd guess somewhere along the way, some sensationalist misreported it as "you can eat Capybara on Fridays, therefore Capybara must be fish."
     
  10. sideshowbob Sorry, wrong number. Valued Senior Member

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    - So, logically--
    - If she weighs the same as a duck...
    - she's made of wood.
    - And therefore?
    - A witch!
     
    DaveC426913 likes this.
  11. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    Zigackly!
     
  12. river Valued Senior Member

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    Observations of the sky are nonsense .

    Therefore anything moving in the night sky , is nonsense.
     
  13. DaveC426913 Valued Senior Member

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    Why?
     
  14. StrangerInAStrangeLa SubQuantum Mechanic Valued Senior Member

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    3.7 million Americans claim to have been abducted by aliens. Most found it a positive experience.

    Why haven't you been contacted?


    from The Paranoid's Pocket Guide by Cameron Tuttle

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