Thank YOU for being so respectful and humble. I just cannot do what you're suggesting. I just can't. Its just been way too much. Way to specific. I know it sounds vague to you but it is extremely specific to me having gone through it. If I were to chalk this up to 1000 coincedences then I would have to consider myself crazy. There's a lot that's gone on. All substantiating. Way too much to type or try to explain entirely. It would take so long. Firstly, this singer I'm talking about is not trent. I didn't even know trent was involved with all this when this particular stuff was going on. He is involved though. Turns out he's the project coordinator so to speak. And it turns out that he was the other being present when I received my "kiss", I'm pretty sure. When I did find out he was involved and in charge, and I familiarized myself with his music I did become infatuated with him for three reasons. One, because of the nature of the project. We were supposed to be accomplishing something good and divine. Two, because by that time, which was about 2 years later, I had become extremely frustrated and and isolated and angry and pretty desperate, and I identified with him. And three, because he and his music had always turned me off in the past, I had no idea what a grade a cocksucker he really is. I assumed a lot of things about him because of the nature of the project, my identification with him, and who he was supposed to be, that as far as I can tell looking at him now, are just not true. As for the singer that I am talking about, I was totally unfamiliar with him until I bought his record. Upon familiarizing myself with him initially, I hate to say this because I adore him now, I was afraid of him and intimidated by him and did not find him attractive at all. I did however feel much sympathy for him. My feelings changed when I got to know more about him and I must say he is a much changed man today thank god. Not angry and sad and so very dark like he was before. I've had 2 anxiety attacks in my life and this experience didn't resemble those at all. And I wasn't anxious when it happened at all. I know they can be spontanious sometimes but I was actually quite relaxed. The experience was almost rapturous feeling. Thanks for sharing that is indeed very interesting.