Wiping after "Number 2"

Memories.

Update: I've begun shaving my ass crack. Wiping is ever so much more pleasant these days.
Still wiping back to front.

 

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Like trying to clean peanut butter out of shag carpet?

 

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Wiping back to front is a baaaad move if you possess a vaheena. Bacterial infections are common in women that wipe back to front.
I am pleased to note I have a naturally hairless ass. Praise Cheeses.

 

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uke: This is nasty.

 

Hehe. This thread is great.

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I've shaved a couple of times, but it seems quite dangerous. I actually cut my penis shaving last time, which was obviously quite a frightening experience.
Have you tried waxing? I've considered it, but having a red raw bumhole sounds nasty.

Lucky bastard

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Your injury reminded me of when I nicked my sack while bushwhacking. DAMN that thing bled like a mug. Just a tiny flap opened up. A hard black dot formed there and remained for almost 3 months! Looked like a bloody tick! I didn't dare pull it off. Needless to say all sex during that time was in the dark. No Exceptions!

Luvin my smoooth ass.

 

invert:
Very sad to see you are still back to front. You will never fully realize your dreams until you fix this.

On a side note, this is the best thread ever and should be moved out of the cesspool and made sticky.

 

I remember this question from a movie. I can't thinik of which one though.

 

Its a bad sign if you clicked on this thread. Wipers repent !

p.s. standing/front to back/half roll/and a wet sponge for good measure.

 

I stand and go front to back. I use old bits of hoof.

 

if you don't use water, you're an animal.

 

Are we the only creature to have ever wiped his ass? Once in a while you might catch a dog pulling himself along with his front legs and dragging its ass across the lawn (carpet if an inside mutt) after a nasty dump. Since this is a science forum I was wondering if other primate post crapping activity has ever been studied?

 

I can see it now... walking down the hall to see on a proffesor's door "Wanted: enthusiastic undergrad student to participate in a research study of primate post-waste-excretion activities, don't miss out on this exciting field of study!"

 

Bend forwards, lifting bum off seat, reach behind and wipe front to back, then stand up a little (not too much) still bending forwards, reach under and wipe back to front, repeat this process until absolutely clean (relatively speaking). Then I call my dog.

 

Weed Eater Guy...They would probably qualify for a government grant seeing how important that study would be. They've given grants for less.

 

If you are having a bout of diarrhea and its firing out so fast that you can feel a backsplash on your buttocks it will take more than that. A dog's loyalty has limits

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You need a free hand, so you must stand or your "Kibbles 'n' Bits" might get a soaking when you let go. It is important to keep your "cash n' prizes" free from the water, as we all know this is the ever important oxygen supply to mens brains.

 

I just scoot on the carpet.....

 

Try using a product called Puro, Hygiene Lotion. It ensures all remnants are off after you wipe. You will be surprised with what was left behind before. Good Puro Lotion as I think the only place you can get the stuff is online.

 

I don't wipe. I let the dingle-berries hang for a couple of days then go to the mall and drop them off the second story onto the unsuspecting people below me. Why was this thread cesspooled I wonder...:bugeye: