I was lisserning to Mat and Dave this morning and they were discussing the Kyle's stupid move to hook up a 14 year old to a lie detector and have her mother ask her about her sexual experiances. This lead the girl to break down on air and reveal she had been raped (which the mother already knew about) Now i fully agree this was stupid and wrong. Even if the girl HADNT been raped there is apsolutly no right for a parent to dig around into an adolessants sexuality, especially on a radio show (is that clear enough for everyone?) However they were interviewing this author who wrote a book called "the sexualisation of girls" (or something like that, i cant rember the exact title im sorry) who was part of some conferance on the issue and she said "young girls paticually in this age group who are sexually active come from broken homes and have issues of drug and achole abuse" Coincidently the fourth National Survey of Students Sexual Health came out today as well (or at least was discussed on ABC radio's AM programe today) and found that 1/3 of year 10 students and 1/2 of year 12 students have had sex. There for she is suggesting that 1/3 of year 10 students come from broken homes and\or have drug and achole problems which i find to be unlikly. This is because these figures dont match up with the infomation given in Mental health topic at uni, health psycology topic at uni and the sociology and epidemology topic at uni and all of these use resorces like the institute of health and wealfare and the ABS to get there stats. They suggest that around 10-20% of adolessants have a mental illness which would mean that every one of those at most 20% are sexually active because of that illness. Now the fourth National Survey of Students Sexual Health DID find that 1/3 of students had experianced unwanted sex but that doesnt stipulate that 1/3 had been raped. Most of us would have had sex when we wernt in the mood at some point in our life and though the increase is concerning it certainly doesnt justify the womens comments that all sexual activity for adolessant girls is wrong or that adolessants shouldnt be able to control there own sexuality (the way she phrased it was that "agency" for adolessants was wrong). Sadly this seems to be another example of the demonisation of sexuality especially youth sexuality which is one of the main reasons for the increase in "risky sex" (ie sex without protection any form of protection and sex with only oral contraception in relationships under 1 year) which is increasing amonst adolessants
oh there doesnt apear to be a transcript from Mat and Dave's programe (i will check again latter) but the one for the NSSSH will be up soon here http://www.abc.net.au/am/content/2009/s2645226.htm Further more i will try to dig up the assignment i did last semester on this issue and post some of the figures from the last NSSSH
I agree too many people think young people's sexuality is their business. So long as they're SAFE people should keep their damn noses out.
VI have you ever come across work by the sociologist "Goffman"? His work on stigma is rather interesting (interlectually anyway, its also quite sad) It aplies quite easerly to youth sexuality, female sexuality, HIV\AIDs, Homosexuality ect.
Uhm. What kids do outside the home IS a parent's business. A parent has both the right and responsibility to find out if their kid is getting their nose dirty in some shit they shouldn't be dealing with, like drugs, drinking, unprotected sex, and the like. Adolescents are not adults. They are not independent. When they move out of their parents home, that is when it is no one's business but their own.
So it's a parent's right to know what they do with their genitalia? Sure, they are not fullt adults. But they are their own people. They need guidance, and certain boundaries like anyone else. But not invasions into what they do privately.
wrong, legally wrong too actually. We abolished aranged marriage years ago for one and even in medical legislation the stated goal is for parents to have limited control until the "child" has the cognative ability to make those decisions for themselves. For instace the consent act states that a child may give (or withhold) consent to a medical procidure without parental consent if the treating physition is satisifyed that the child can act in there own best intrests. Once the child hits 16 that becomes automatic except if they are under an order of guardianship granted by the courts because of mental incapacity Further more that control is limited by the courts. For instance a child can be treated against the wishes of the parent if 2 doctors stated opinion is that the treatment is medically nessary. To look at the oposite side a) there is no requirement for a doctor to give a treatment they dont feel is nessary anyway b) for certain procidures (like sterilisation of a mentally handicaped child) the guardianship boards permission (or the family court, it varries from state to state) is required before the treatment can be authorised.
The medical stuff is due to parents not giving adequate attention to the medical needs of their kids. The government makes no laws that respect an adolescent's right to privacy, asguard, and since that is the subject of this thread, that's what we're talking about. Adolescents have no legal right to privacy.
Umm, speak for yourself, people. If I had kids, they would wear a chastity belt until they were old enough to apply for social security unless certain conditions had been satisfied. It's not a matter of them being "ready." It's a matter of paternal protectiveness. This is natural to my behavior, and I will not be criticized for it. If I had a daughter, I wouldn't let some Joe Phony come within two miles of her, and she would be a blackbelt or a brownbelt in every self-defense technique in the book before she could swallow solid foods. If I had a son, he would know respect for women and homos better than he knows his reflection in the mirror, and he would know that loose girls are all infested with the Clap before he could crawl.
Like what sort of private things? Drugs? Drinking? Unprotected sex? You think parents shouldn't know if their kids are doing those things? Gimme a break.
actually your wrong there. Take for instance a 14 year old who attends a GP in order to get the pill. The doctor assess her, explaines the potentual side effects and risks and makes a determination that she understands the risks and benifts of the treatment and can act in her own best interests. He there for is alowed to perscribe the pill and does so. As part of that determination he is now bound by pt confidentuality because once someone has been determined able to to handle there own medical treatments they have a right to privacy (actually they always do its just that while the parents are treating they are included in that disclosure, once the are judged unnessary they lose that access) The same goes for getting an abortion. It becomes illegal for the doctor to phone the parents and tell them that there child got an abortion Mental illness is even MORE secrect in that the doctor maybe able to tell the parents "your child has depression" if they are judged to be unable to self treat but they cant go into detail on what the child said. Youth help line is another service which is goverment funded which is compleatly confidential. There are innumberable goverment services which are unable to report back to parents, nor should they be able to.
Asguard, please show me a law on the books that states that parents are allowed to know the things that their children are getting into outside of the home.
what things? there is no right to privacy PERIOD except in certain cirumstances so what are you refering to? If i happen to see you smoking weed, fucking or whatever and tell your parent, your child, your wife what law prevents that? NONE. However if you were my patient and i disclose that to anyone THEN im up for action both proffessionaly and legally.
Your point being? We already know doctors must be confidential. The point is that parents do have a right to know when their kids are doing drugs, drinking, having unprotected sex, and the like. Those are bad things, not good things, and kids shouldn't be doing them. Parents should know when they are. Unsupervised kids are a bad thing, not a good thing.
right, because if a child doesnt trust there parent they will feel SO comfertable aproching them when they DO have a problem (depression, rape, ect) Im sure this girl has all the confidence in the world in the mother to surport her right? The point is that you are wrong, there is no requirement to tell the parents anything and alot of times where disclosure is illegal. There ARE some cases where its required to report it to the Department of Families and Communities (or equivlant, DOCS ect) like child abuse but that is just about the only requirment for disclosure there is. its actually something i have been trying to pound through some very thick heads at St John's that if a person is 16 (and younger as i stated above) its illegal to inform the parents of medical treatment provided to them or anything said while in a theripudic realtionship
You're missing a vital point. Parents want to be kept informed/aware of what their children are doing or up to. And to do that, parents want their children to share with them. Be able to talk to them and be open about what they are doing. As a parent, I want to know if and when my children (when they reach that age of course) so much as think about becoming sexually active. As a parent, it is my role to guide them in the right path and if I think they are too young, then I will hopefully be able to guide them down the 'wait till you're older' path. Of course, ideally, they would never have sex (nervous cackle), because well, they're my babies.:bawl: But being realistic, I would expect that they would wait until they were ready and that when they did do "it", they'd be careful and use precautions. Would I snoop in their rooms to see if they were doing drugs or something that could harm them? Yes. Absolutely. If I suspected that either of my kids were snorting, ingesting or injecting illegal substances into their bodies, I'd be checking their rooms. And if I found hard drugs (eg. heroin, crack, ecstacy, etc), then I'd take it from there and see about rehab if it was needed, etc. My role as their parent is to ensure they remain safe and healthy. And if I need to snoop in their rooms to do so, then yeah, I'd have no problems with that. If they became sexually active as teenagers, then it is my role as their parent to make sure they are careful and ready.
bells how much benifit would you expect to see from that? You have probably worked with offenders who have been sentanced to drug and achole rehab. Care to guess what the success rates are for it when the person is forced to go rather than seeking help themselves? Partually this is because most drug and achole abuse is an attempt by the person to self medicate for a mental illness and throwing them into a rehab center wont fix that but that isnt the whole story. You can take a person who has an altered GCS because of sepsis, strap them to the bed and pump them full of antibotics and they will get better but if the problem is mental illness do you think that aproch will really work? Further more how do you think your children would react when you confrunted them with there little 1 gram of weed or pack of smokes or empty beer botle? do you think that would improve or damage your relationship? On the sex specifically i am not saying encoraging safe sex is wrong, what im saying is that the parents who find out there child (mostly girls this happens to) are having sex and then say "i forbid you to see this person again" or "your grounded" ect. What do you think that adolessant is going to do? and what do you think they are going to do if down the track they get into a situation they cant handle (like they get raped, there drink is spiked or they fall pregant or get a girl pregant ect). Do you think they will feel comfertable comming to you? this isnt an achademic argument, its something im watching my partner go through right now. Her little sister (15) probably has cervical cancer. Now her parents might have been able to help her but unfortantly she wasnt living with them at the time (she is back with her dad now but her mum has had to go overseas for work for 2 years) she was living with relitives in sydney because she wanted to be a hair dresser and her relitive was training her. Not someone she could go to for help
This is why you should never lose your temper with a child. It is a sign of mental weakness, and the child knows it. To that child, you are legislature, president, judge, and jury. Well, think about how you would feel if you were sitting in front of a judge, and the judge broke down into a fit of temper. I'd feel embarrassed to know that he/she works in my district, and a congressman somewhere would have one more letter to read. Trust is the only discipline that works. A lot of people don't know what trust is. Trust is that my little, black lab would jump off a cliff in the dark if I told her to, and I never had to lay a hand on her to put that trust there. Perhaps a better word for some people would be "faith." Anything I did would be justified in the eyes of that dog because I taught her to believe in me. I've had a few dogs in the past. I've yelled at some, and I've still got a big, ugly scar on my thumb from the one I was stupid enough to raise my hand against. This is the best-behaved animal I've had, so I'm pretty sure I'm on to something in saying this: if you have good control over yourself, an animal is going to be a lot more confident in you. I bet the same thing applies to children. I, for one, would want to make sure my children understood the importance of courtship. Courtship brings dignity to themselves, their families, and their communities. If they have truly come to understand that principle and defend it, then who they have sex with or how is their business at that point. The thing is, telling parents not to keep an eye on their kids is like telling a bear in the woods not to chase you away from her cubs. You can blather all you want, but all she'll do is tear your face off. In the end, it just makes you look stupid and very badly disfigured.
