Does this count as paedophilia?

Well the point is she hasn't actually DONE anything right? In that case its fine... what does it matter if she has a crush on some little kid? It's not hurting anyone really.

ALSO daydream, the definition of a paedophile is an adult who is sexually attracted to younger children right? Look it up, thats the def., well SHE IS NOT AN ADULT, not at only 15... she'd have to be over 18, alright? So don't worry. If she acts on it kill her.
 
daydream believer is the only person on this forum that knows both people and is able to decide whether more damage will be done to the 11 year old by her silence, or more to her friendship by her telling. 15 is DEFFINATELY not too young for sexual relationships
stupid Lemming3k took my point that a little while ago people were married at 15, ill add that 13 and 14 were much more common ages and 12 was not too rare

"As for the 15 year old girl, can't she find boys her own age" i am a 15 year old guy, and ill be one of the first to admit that we as a general group tend to be a bit shallow, obsessed with sex and slightly selfish (reading over my own writing, we also dont like being called boys)

as for everyone talking about "age of consent", c'mon, this is an ethics forum not a legal forum. anyway, who would agree that an 18 year old and a 90 year old is acceptable? yet they're both over "age of consent"
 
Where does the word stupid fit into your post? you've put it before my name and im slightly confused of what you are trying to say(Are you referring to me even though i agreed with you?) if i've repeated what you said i apologise i may have missed your post by accident, i simply wrote my opinion.(i just happen to pretty much agree with you)
 
to the bozo who said 15 yr olds are not "ready" for sex:
15, 14, 13 and even 12 yr olds are "ready", mentally and phsyically for sex, im 14, i would know. i dont profess to be an expert on you elderly, so dont do the same to us young.
 
sorry lemming3k, i wasnt really calling u stupid, id just worked out what i wanted to say, then ud already sed it, so i had to think of something else. dont worry

harlu, damm right!
 
sargentlard said:
15 is an acceptable age for sexual activity in your opinion?

Not biologically but in your opinion?

15ofthe19's answer fits quite neatly into how I feel about it.
15ofthe19 said:
An eleven year old is a child, and has absolutely no business engaging in sexual relations. So to answer your question, yes, that's definitely pedophilia.

As for the 15 year old, that's a little young, but getting into that grey area where it's possible that a 15 year old could be emotionally prepared, but that still might not make it a good idea. I knew a few kids that started that young, and it's about 50/50 as to how they turned out.

Biologically, of course they are ready.
Emotionally, some are mature enough, some are not.
It all depends on your surroundings and your upbringing.
 
alain said:
who would agree that an 18 year old and a 90 year old is acceptable? yet they're both over "age of consent"

Me.

Why not?

If they are happy, what's the problem?

Ever see "Harold and Maude"?
If you haven't, I highly recommend it.
I know it's "just a movie", but I think the sentiment rings true.
 
We've all heard of child molesters, but how about adult molesters?

I was 7, she was 18, I sat on her lap and kissed her on the cheek and she laughed at my cheekiness, that only served to encourge me, before long I had my arm underneath her blouse and was carressing her bare back as I kissed her tenderly on the lips. I don't know how long this went on for, perhaps a few minutes before she became kind of indignant and chased me out the room threatening to tell my dad about what I'd done. She did and he laughed. The important point that I remember is that it was I that instigated it and that for a few moments she did actually seem to enjoy it, even kissing me back on the lips, until she obviously realised that what we were doing was wrong.
 
harlu said:
to the bozo who said 15 yr olds are not "ready" for sex:
15, 14, 13 and even 12 yr olds are "ready", mentally and phsyically for sex, im 14, i would know. i dont profess to be an expert on you elderly, so dont do the same to us young.

Don't worry, I thought I knew everything, too, when I was your age. I was an obnoxious little brat. Let your elders assure you, most adults aren't even ready for a sexual relationship! If you think you're quite ready you simply don't realize the implications of the decision. You're young, and as these outbursts clearly show, not emotionally ready for that sort of commitment or attachment to someone. Don't think of this as an insult, it's just a fact about your particular place in social development.

Before looking to get into a sexual relationship, try first to master driving, and possibly getting a job and learning how to support yourself, these are more important skills that shouldn't take a back-seat to screwing.
 
tablariddim said:
We've all heard of child molesters, but how about adult molesters?

I was 7, she was 18. . .

This confirms my suspicions about most supposed cases of pedophilia. Michael Jackson, the catholic priesthood, countless "low lifes" around the nation. . . maybe we shouldn't be blaming the adults here, but instead we should be turning a scrutinizing eye to those slutty little boys.
 
Mystech said:
Michael Jackson, the catholic priesthood, countless "low lifes" around the nation. . . maybe we shouldn't be blaming the adults here, but instead we should be turning a scrutinizing eye to those slutty little boys.
I cannot find the case reference, but in the 1980s, a Wisconsin judge acquitted a man of molesting a three year-old girl on the grounds that she behaved promiscuously and tempted him.
Alain said:
anyway, who would agree that an 18 year old and a 90 year old is acceptable?
Maggie Kuhn. I highly recommend the PBS production Maggie Growls.
We've all heard of child molesters, but how about adult molesters?
Hey, I learned to harass women before I knew why I was harassing them. I used to whistle at the women in Diet Pepsi commercials, and everyone would laugh. It's one of the benefits of not being popular in school that I never actually hurt anyone, but I was in high school before I figured out there was something wrong with acting like that, much less what it was.

General Comment

Absent from this or, generally, any discussion of youth and sexuality these days is a certain medical aspect that is very important. Certes we hear of HIV, HPV, pregnancy, and so forth, but there is also much evidence indicating that a human female beginning sexual intercourse at, say, the age of her first period, is not a wise idea. That they're old enough to bleed does not make them old enough to breed; there's a gray zone pushing around between 14 and 17 that says if a woman begins sexual intercourse before this point, she triples her risk of cervical cancer. Sex before a body is ready can be as bad as smoking for twenty years.

So despite the fact that I have seen 11 year-old girls appear shockingly mature, and despite the fact that we're rushing children to become adults in every other way while simultaneously sexualizing them in order to support our economy while actually trying to quash hormones (a losing battle to begin with), I think the true ethical consideration lies well-beyond the immediate questions of whether or not an 11 year-old is simply emotionally prepared for sex.

I like pot. I like smoking pot. I think more people should smoke pot. But f@cking up the developing brain of an 11 year-old with a joint a daily bong rip is simply rude and inadvisable.

Same thing with sex. I like f@cking. I think people should f@ck more. But f@cking up the developing anatomy and medical future of a child all for an orgasm is beyond rude and inadvisable.

In older times (into the late 19th century, at least) statutes existed placing a girl's age of consent at ten years old. In some jurisdictions you could buy their consent. Nothing about informed consent, nothing about maturity. Knowing that we could condemn a generation to battling cancer, should we go forward with what was good enough for older, more traditional American mores?

Eleven year-olds should only be screwed by federal education policy. And even that is a dubious permission.
 
It is true that in ages past 14 year olds were considered to be a prime age for motherhood. However, back then people also died at the age of 30, and huddled in fear of witches and goblins.
 
Saying adults are not ready for sex is BS, sex is connected to the instinct to reproduce, we are born with that instinct, we are ready as soon as our bodys develope because of that instinct, sex is one thing, sex as part of a loving relationship is different, theres an emotional connection for that, some people will never be ready for that but we all are ready for sex as a mindless act of reproduction as soon as our bodys develope. If someone who is ready for sex says they dont want it they are lieing(they may not want it with a particular person, but they want it, its basic human and animal instinct)
 
The thing still is, people, that no matter what this girl WANTS, she's not getting it... and so far as daydream has told us the girl has done nothing about it. So where's the harm if she leaves him totally alone? And it still ISN'T paedophilia because SHE IS NOT AN ADULT.
 
Contrary to poular belief, pedophelia does not imply action.
A pedophile is an adult that is sexually attracted towards children.
What age you consider someone to be an "adult", or whether age is even a factor in considering someone an "adult" is another question.
 
"Saying adults are not ready for sex is BS, sex is connected to the instinct to reproduce, we are born with that instinct, we are ready as soon as our bodys develope because of that instinct, sex is one thing, sex as part of a loving relationship is different, theres an emotional connection for that, some people will never be ready for that but we all are ready for sex as a mindless act of reproduction as soon as our bodys develope. If someone who is ready for sex says they dont want it they are lieing(they may not want it with a particular person, but they want it, its basic human and animal instinct)"

that is not true. Or at least, many people arent ready for socially acceptable sex (ie, one partner) Many adults and teens cheat on their partners


one raven -
"Me.

Why not?

If they are happy, what's the problem?"

what if the 11 and 14 year old are both happy, or a 12 and a 30 year old?

will everyone stop bringing up Michael Jacksons name in Paedophilia cases, nothing was proved against him, leave the poor guy alone
 
Oh and daydream, the other thing i was wondering... if he'll 11, and looks it, and acts it. Then why the hell is a 14-yr-old attracted to him at all? Let alone sexually... doesn't that seem weird to anyone? Because if he looked old or was a rebel or advanced forward in school or whatever, then perhaps. But if he's just an ordinary little kid who plays Harry Potter then why?! (seriously daydream, answer that)
 
I wrote this a while back.
It is a true story, except that I was not on my way to Boston for a conference.
It isn't finished yet, but I think it expresses how I feel about the whole subject...

I was on a train once. I was on my way from New York to Boston for a conference. The train stopped just north of New York City to pick up a few passengers. The train stopping always jars me from my sleep, regardless of how tired I may be. I glanced at my travel alarm on the seat next to me and it read 11:43 PM. Curiosity got the best of me (as it often does) and looked up to see what interesting characters were boarding. A lovely little girl walked into sight and gripped my attention. She must have been about twelve or thirteen years old.
It seemed that her body had begun to develop a little earlier than typical. She had reached a precarious age. She had just begun to see boys as more than just annoying playmates. She had been thrust into a body that felt sexuality. People could easily make the mistake of calling her a young woman because she had the body of one. Her boobies had already become breasts. She had hips. Her newly discovered grace and sensuality was evident in everything about her. The way she moved. The way she stood. The boys in her class had discovered her body already. She had also already discovered her body. I can understand how people can see her as a young woman.
Just about every man in the world (heterosexual man, of course) is attracted to young girls. They don't like to admit it. They think that they are freaks, or that finding such a young girl sexually appealing would mean they are pedophiles. They do not realize that nearly all men in every walk of life feel the same way. People laugh and half-heartedly offer that Shakespeare's Juliet was only thirteen years old, but the fact is that thirteen year old girls are sexual beings. They are capable of reproducing. In various times throughout history, and in some modern cultures, thirteen is a perfectly acceptable age for marriage. It is obvious that our bodies were designed to be able to procreate that early. There is nothing to be ashamed about being attracted to young girls. So many men are attracted to tight firm little bodies because young women have them, not the opposite. Even more than that it is their innocence. They look at the world through un-jaded trusting eyes. They haven't lost that yet. You can look into her eyes and see every bit of who that child is. She is not hiding behind anything. She is not peeking out from behind a one-way mirror. She is simply who she is. No barriers. No false fronts. If you looked into the eyes of this girl on the train, she was unmistakably still a little girl.
The difference between pedophiles and the rest of us, is intention, understanding and compassion. The pedophile sees this wonderful innocent pure little girl. He wants to hold this precious gift. He wants to posses it. He doesn't really understand that by doing this, he is ripping away what he does love about her. He is breaking her. He wants to own this piece of exquisite purity. What he doesn't realize is that this part of her that he is so in love with is like a pair of butterfly wings. By even touching this purity it becomes damaged, and will never be the same again. The only way he can experience the beauty he craves is to take it away from her.
I sat there and wondered about this girl. I wondered when this gift of innocence will be ripped away from her. Not if, but when. I wondered who would be the one to do it. I wondered if her mother taught her right. I wondered if she was told, "Yes, you are very pretty, but that really doesn't matter. It is who you are, not what you look like that matters."
 
Lemming3k said:
If someone who is ready for sex says they dont want it they are lieing(they may not want it with a particular person, but they want it, its basic human and animal instinct)

There's a big difference between wanting it and being emotionally ready for it. If you honestly think that all adults are inherently ready for the responsibility of a sexual relationship then my advice to you would be to go out and meet more adults. Better yet, talk to most adults about their first sexual encounter. With women especialy (I think men are more inclined to brag reguardless of the truth) you'll find that a lot of people regret having lost their virginity at the time ant to the person they lost it too, usualy saying that they thought they were ready but only understood later that they weren't.
 
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