The Most Offensive Jokes Ever!!!

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What is it when a nigger is taking a shower?
A miracle.

Three niggers all jump off a cliff to see who will hit the ground first. who wins?
Society.


Did you hear about the winner of the black beauty contest?
Me neither.
 
What did the big black nigger say to the skinny little pansy Jew-wop?

"I'd rip your balls off , but you don' have any, do you, you skinny little prick?"
 
Vkothii said:
What did the big black nigger say to the skinny little pansy Jew-wop?

"I'd rip your balls off , but you don' have any, do you, you skinny little prick?"
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lol two birds with one stone, nice


How many niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Doesn't matter, they're too stupid to!
 
Norsefire said:
Why are niggers dumb? Because they are niggers! :roflmao:
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Norsefire said:
Ha, what's the stupidest kind of ape?

A NIGGER LOL

What's black, ugly, smelly, stupid, and lazy?

A BLACK LOL
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Norsefire said:
Why are stupid black nigger motherfuckers dumbasses?

because they are lol!
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Moderator notice: These are not jokes - even offensive jokes.

This is just pure, unadulterated racist hate-mongering.

Norsefire is banned for 3 days.
 
A paki and a nigger jump off a bridge, who hits the floor first?

Who gives a shit?
 
Two old chaps have been for a few beers and a game of bowls at their local. Driving home they knock a black boy off his bike. In a panic they put the boy and his bike in the boot of the car with the bowling balls. Later, they are pulled over by the coppers. The PC gets on his radio. "Sarge I've found a niggers nest. What's more, one's hatched and it's already nicked a bike."

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70% of black males say they enjoy sex in the shower... The other 30% haven't been 2 prison yet.

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My wife doesn't like the old car I got her, she said she wants something that goes from 0 to 140 in 3 secs, so i got the fat bitch a set of bathroom scales.
 
A muslim in our street doused himself in petrol and set himself on fire and died. We're having a collection 4 his family. So far we've got 80 litres.

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(about the flaming jeep plowing into the glasgow airport enterence last year)
Useless Paki fuckers: Foreign doctors, 3 bombs, no deaths. Harold Shipman: 1 syringe, 300 deaths. Makes you proud to be British!
 
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What's the deal with this assholes and buttholes that suddenly claim there are lesbians after you sleep with them. I met this girl, we had sex a couple of times, then she woke up one morning and said she was a lesbian, she even pointed out her Lez mate. Folks, if you ever need pennis to fill you up from time to time then you probably aren't a lesbian, you probably are bi curious or bisexual, or just bi stupid. Folks, all i'm asking is foretell a guy, we are not going to call the cops we promise. Nobody cares.
 
Patrick Swayze has just turned down the oppertunity to star in Dirty Dancing (The sequel).

Apparently he is trying to hold on for a few more months to star in Ghost 2.
 
If there's two muslims in concrete to the chest, what do you have?

You've mixed too little concrete!

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Wicked Willy sits on his bedside, fantasising he's driving a car - using big sounds.
The nurse comes and asks what he's doing.
"I'm driving a car on my way to Alabama!"
"Oh well", the nurse says "have a nice trip!"
She leaves the room and goes to see Crazy Christian, he's on his bedside masturbating!.
The nurse yells: "What are you doing Christian??"
Christian responds: "I'm fucking Willys wife while he's in Alabama!"
 
Pavarotti met Princess Di in heaven. "I'd love to have a halo as big as yours" says the Tenor. "Fuck off Fatty" says Di, "it's not a halo it's a steering wheel."

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7 men of good design, made a pussy so devine:
1st a Butcher full of wit, used a knife and made a slit.
2nd a Carpenter big and bold, used a drill to bore a hole.
3rd a Tailer tall and thin, used red velvet to line it in.
4th a Hunter short and stout, used fox fur to line it out.
5th a Fisherman nasty as hell, threw in a fish and gave it a smell.
6th a Vicar name of McGee, felt it and blessed it and said it could pee.
7th a Sailor a dirty old runt, sucked it and fucked it and called it a cunt.

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I've just seen ur name on a loaf of bread... thick cut.
 
What do you call 60,000 niggers on a plane heading back to Africa? A good start.

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This was from about 2 years ago
The 8 year old boy who weighs 14 stone was asked earlier on TV what his favourite musical instrument was at school. The fat cunt said the dinner bell.
 
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Been loving this site for a while and now feel the need to add to it. Any more pratick swayze jokes?

Mining Industry in Wales has just reopened. Apparantly they have just discovered some copper in snowdonia!
 
Bloke goes into an antique shop and asks how much the cat is. The owner says 50 for the brass cat and 50 for its story. Bloke says I'll just take the brass cat thanks. As he leaves the shop a cat starts following him, then 100 cats, then a 1,000. So he throws the brass cat into the river and the 1000 cats jump in after it and drown. So he goes back to the shop and the owner says "back for the story?" He says "No. Have you got any brass Pakis"

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THE SAD LIFE OF A PENIS:
I've only 1 eye, me hairs a mess, me rellies are nuts, me neighbours an arsehole, me best friends a cunt and me owners a wanker.
 
Skunk said:
Been loving this site for a while and now feel the need to add to it. Any more pratick swayze jokes?

Mining Industry in Wales has just reopened. Apparantly they have just discovered some copper in snowdonia!
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you racist!!
 
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