Scivillage

SCIVILLAGE
report by: Outcast- spuriousmonkey
Day 10? - 'a talk'

I was minding my own business as usual (looking into the windows of other villagers and see what they were doing) when ScRaMbLe wanted to talk to me. He needed to talk to me in private. It was apparently something important. I immediately pointed out to him that I just look gay, but am not really gay. But he assured me that it was nothing of the sort.

First he asked if he could date my sister. 'Well, ScRaMbLe, I guess so, but you do know that she has been with half the village already?' I asked him. He didn't mind. He was in love with her and nothing else mattered. He subsequently asked if we had different fathers since my sister was quite a looker. I had to tell him the sad story about how my mother used to drop me on my head when I was a baby, a little boy, and a teenager. I took out my bottle of scirum and took a big sip. ScRaMbLe looked expectantly at me. I poored him a cup.

Now he had my blessing he wanted to discuss another urgent matter. He had been stalking the tiger and observing it. He told me everything. About how he saw the tiger in bed with me (I didn't quite believe that. I think the scirum was doing the talking here), about how the tiger moved in and out of the village, always checking things out, how it was always looking for things to eat, and how it always seem to be near me.

He had been using sandwiches as bait for the tiger, but without much real success. He told me about his new plan. He would tie me to a tree in the forest and use me to lure the tiger in. That was his entire plan. I asked him what he would do when the tiger would come. He hadn't thought about that yet. I said I would think about it (yeah right!).
 
day 10....still

Batter up

Spurious looked concerned when i said I had to talk to him. He seemed worried that people thought he was a batty boy. I assured him that people thought no such thing and that I didn't bat for that team. I told him if he was so worried then perhaps he should do something about the way he walked and should probably stop whistling "its raining men". My advice seemed to put him at ease.

We soon opened a bottle of scirum and started some serious drinking. I decided now would be a good time to approach the subject of his sister. Spurious' sister was the local seamstress of the village and I needed someone to make some cloth sacks for me. My crops had been harvested and I needed something to store and transport them in. I said to him "I've heard your sister has quite a reputation in the sack business". He must have somehow mis-interpreted what I said and then gave me permission to date her. I was surprised, but hey, who was I to argue? Besides, she was a hottie, well, by village standards anyway.

The conversation soon turned to the tiger and I was surprised to learn that he knew as little about the tiger as I did. We devised a plan to lure the tiger with some live bait, namely him. I would have done it myself but I had a bit of a runny nose and might have been coming down with the flu, so I thought it best that he did it. He seemed dubious, so I left it at that for the time being.

I then asked him if he would be interested in going into business selling his now famous scirum. I told him I had already established many contacts in the neighbouring villages through my other various contraband dealings and could make him a lot of money... especially if we burned down Rogues bar first. All we needed was a willing firebug to help us out...
 
SCIVILLAGE
report by: Outcast- spuriousmonkey
Day 10? - 'more talk, more play'

ScRaMbLe wanted to build up a scirum syndicate. He would head the empirium and get all the money and I would make scirum. That didn't sound like a good idea. I asked for 20% of the money. Ha, the fool fell for it.

He wanted to burn down the bar. I really couldn't do that. I had some wonderful memories associated with that bar. I had spend most of my adult life in it. I suggested that we just open our own bar. We would outcompete rogue's bar. That wouldn't be too hard.

Ozymandias place looked most promising for a location of the new bar. We needed to make him leave this particular hut so we could buy it.

I suggested we would catch the tiger each night and let it loose in Ozzies house. Sooner or later Ozzy would be too scared to even enter his place.

I agreed to be the lure for the tiger.

ScRaMbLe tied me to a tree and threw a bucket of pig grease over me. I was apparently all jummy according to tiger eyes.

ScRaMbLe waited behind a tree with a tranquilizer in a syringe.

The wait was on.


I was getting hungry and licked some of the grease of my face.
 
Day 10
The wait

In accordance with our plan I tied Spurious to the tree. He complained when I emptied a bucket of pig fat over him but I assured him it was necessary. I filled a syringe I had swiped from Dr Lou and sat back and waited.

It seemed like ages had passed and no sign of the tiger. I started to rummage around looking for something to use as a bong, as mine had been broken. I looked up in the tree and saw some coconuts and had a brilliant idea... I would make a coco-bong, it already had the necessary liquid inside, I just had climb up and get one. Spurious yelled at me saying "Stop being such a friggin pothead, just f**kin wait, you cant leave me tied here, ya f**kin dickhead!"
I dont know what he was getting so uptight about, it'd only take a minute, the tiger was nowhere in sight and there's no way anything could happen in that short amount of time...
 
Day-?????
Yes I caught that damn tiger. He was asleep. (to much knockout pills). I dragged him to the woods. I saw Spuriousmonkey tied to a tree and I asked why. He said that he is bait for the tiger, but him seeing the tiger in my hands he wanted out. I helped him out before he got into a big mess. But I felt sorry for that poor fellow and just handed him the tiger. I just went back to my shop. :D
 
Animal, Tiger - Kunax
Day 10: El Cerdo

I awoke felling all dissy, something was not rigth, had i been sleep walked again, was i sleep walking, backwards?.
No somebody was dragging me, i did not like that, but i could not seem to get up. Finally he stopped dragging me, so i could get a little rest, i only need a few minuts to collect me self before i would revenge myself.
As certified psycho passed by me, I got up, I knew my attacker now. In a single jump I closed the distance between us and with my claws extended hit him in the back, sending him flying in to the bushes.

I was just about to follow after, when i got the scent of something far more intresting.
There by a big tree, was something that looked like a human but had the smell of pig, he would taste much better then certified psycho i thougth as i walk up to spuriousmonkey pig incognito.
A pig would be a nice change, from the last couple of days of eating the fat samon that swims up stream each year. I could still taste the fishy taste in my mouth, a pig would be a most welcome change.

Standing face to face with my pray, he was pressing him self against the tree, putting a paw on his check to holding him down, i leaned forward and licking spuriousmonkey greasy face, he was holding his breath and his face was turning more and more red, as i breath some more on spuriousmonkey, his face if possible turned even more red.
 
Kunax has pissed me off again. After I woke up I saw him licking spuriousmonkey. He was peeing in his pants. With a rifle in my hands, I slowly approached the tiger and rifle butted him in the head. He fell. After thaat I untied spuriousmonkey off that tree and told him to wash himself off that pig smell.
 
SCIVILLAGE
report by:
Genius: cool skill

DAY18
I was under my bed yesterday, and I started smelling the smoke. Sheet! My bed was on fire! It burns! It burns!
All of a sudden, the fire was distinguished as buckets of water poured all over my bed. I was drenched, but at least I wasn't burnt.
I got up from under my bed. It was ruined. This is terrible. It took me most of the afternoon to carry all of the rubbish to the land fill, and clean the mess up. After rinsing myself off at the waterfall, I went home to sleep. I went to the spot where my bed used to be, and slept on the floor. I had to be well rested for tomorrows journey. For tomorrow I will set off in search for the most extinguished scientist in town to help me with my latest invention idea . . . the fire distinguisher.
 
Day 10

I got down from the coconut tree and started to make my way back to where Spurious was tied. To my surprise, Certified was there undoing the ropes... Then I got a bit closer i saw the tiger laying on the ground! He looked like he was ready to pounce and I dont think Certified had seen him! I had to act quickly, I only had one coconut so I only had one shot to save Certified. I threw it as hard as I could at the tiger.

I missed.

I hit Certified on the head.

Certified fell over.

When I got closer I discovered the tiger had already been knocked out.

oops.
 
Arggh. When I woke up I saw the tiger in my face I was scared there for a moment, but kunax was knocked out. I got up and threw the coconut back at ScRaMbLe but I missed. He said sorry for throwing the coconut at me. I forgave him. I handed the tiger over to him and we went our ways.
 
Can I be the “Insane homicidal village inbreed mutant”? You know like the guy in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie only worse.

“On this day many in the village wake up to the sound of a chainsaw and inhuman chuckling, with horror they relies that the vile tiny beast has finally escaped from the old well out by the condemned satanic worshiping center.”
 
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Scivillage
Report by - Town whore - Sargentlard
Day? - Too drunk to remember

Have slept with every Sci female in town to mostly great reviews of my performance....Sci males are jealous of my gift and have planned to kill me but can not due to the blinding rage that will ensue by the sci females if my sweet loving is
lost. Sci males face castration or total package loss if they attempt touch or harm me in any way. Life is good.

Being drunk is great....
 
cool skill
How about you just list me as “mutant” for short.

Day 1:
After escaping from my prison I have found sanctuary in a old used tire, it comes with a pool to sleep in and lots of mosquito larva to eat. I been preparing my deadly killing instruments of doom (a dental drill… hey a chain saw is a little to big for me!) for my first murder of revenge, followed by my second murder of mercy, third of necessity and finally a forth for tax evasion purposes. I think that will be enough murdering for the week.
After picking up a local newspaper I believe sargentlard will be my first victim apparently he think he’s some kind of sex king, I wonder if the ladies will like him after I mutilate his face.
 
The end of days

To catch a tiger by the tail

I surveyed the scene before me. The tiger lay still on the ground. Certified lay still beside it. Spurious was standing nearby. What had I done? What was this madness?

I woke up Certified and after apologizing for my inaccuracy he handed me back my coconut and went on his way. Spurious seemed rather keen to wash himself off so he made his way to the local river. I was left standing there with the apparently lifeless tiger laying in the grass. In a moment of clarity I came to a realization.

What lay before me was a powerful beast, but a beast more powerful, lay, in the hearts of men.

I now knew that which must be done. I must leave this village.

You cannot catch a tiger by the tail, for you will forever be trapped in a vicious circle.

I made my way back to my hut and collected all my belongings, packing them into the cart. The rest of the day was spent going round the village saying my goodbyes. I stopped off at Rogues bar for one last drink then jumped on my cart and made my way out of town. On the edge of town I stopped and looked back. The smell of burning huts was still ripe in the air and this strengthened my resolve. I turned to face the road and spurred my horse into action.

Perhaps I would be back some day, perhaps I would not.

With that thought I made myself comfy in my seat and set off down the road.
 
Sadly for ScRaMbLe, he happened to pass a abandoned tire, he also did not notice me crawling up into his cart as I am very small. His eyeball juices made good jelly.

That’s what he gets for leaving town.
 
report by spuriousmonkey - outcast

The end of days

I had cleaned myself up and packed up my distillery and my stock of scirum. I saw ScRaMbLe going away on his cart. I asked if he could give me a ride.

Some crawly worm was crawling up his back. I picked it up and squashed it under my foot. It looked a bit like a mutant fetus, but I probably had too much to drink already. I would come back to the village if there was less fire and murder, and more tea and muffins.
 
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